Rustic Healing

Surviving Violent Crime Through Emergency Preparedness

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"Leaving your personal safety and health to someone else is like giving your housekey to a stranger."

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Welcome to Rustic Healing

I created this blog to share ways to enhance your personal safety and wellness through simple emergency preparedness strategies. If you’re suffering with health issues and trauma, you’ve come to the right place. A stranger abduction, carjacking and armed robbery survivor on the battlefield with late-stage Lyme disease, I understand firsthand the long-term effects of violent crime and the importance of being prepared for anything. 
I also address ways to support your health and wellness through an anti-inflammatory diet and lifestyle. I believe there is a direct connection between trauma and chronic illness, including Lyme disease. Through personal readiness strategies, we can thrive in a crisis.

Note: I am not a doctor and cannot dispense medical advice. I am not cured or pretend to be.

Canned Goods Saved My Life,
How Stocking Your Pantry Can Save Yours!

Did you know that by simply keeping your pantry well-stocked, you can avoid making unnecessary trips to the grocery and/or convenient store? In fact, properly storing extra food, water and everyday household goods you normally consume can shelter you during times of societal unrest, inclement weather and job and/or financial loss.  The simple act of putting away canned goods can provide you a nourishing, life-saving meal, thwarting your need to leave the house at an unforeseen hour when you’re more likely to be exposed to danger.
If you are on the sidelines with an illness, then you know just how impossible it can be to venture out to the supermarket, much less get dressed or drive. Over the last year and half, I experienced an acute facial pain episode which required a soft food diet. I was often alone and at the mercy of the worst pain I have ever experienced in my life. The condition is referred to as Trigeminal Neuralgia, and it is a beast.
During this medical crisis, I was in unchartered territory, unable to turn my head, lay down, sleep or eat without excruciating pain. Forced off of my normal diet and routine without adequate pain management and warning cast me into survival mode. Out of necessity, I delved into the solace of my undisturbed, dark pantry where simple, nutritious meals awaited a crisis and a warm skillet.
Note: To extend canned good shelf life, store in a cool dry place. Avoid hot closets or garage storage rooms. Every few months, turn cans upside down to preserve product consistency.

 

Are canned goods safe to consume after the expiration date? I question this every time I clean out my pantry, dust the tops of the cans and contemplate whether to toss them into the trash. Before making the daunting decision to throw away two-year old pumpkin puree’, consider the following telltale food spoilage conditions: Rusting, leaking, bulging, bubbling, denting or swelling.

In the 1700’s, Nicolas Appert, a French confectioner and chef, successfully preserved a variety of foods and is considered the pioneer of canning. 

If you don't have access to a pantry, bookshelves can provide easy access and convenience for your canned and dry goods storage. I brought this wooden rack in from the garage and put it to use.
                        Emergency Meal Bowl Recipe
1 can Swanson’s white chicken meat
1 can Progresso black beans whole
I can carrots
1 can green peas
1/2 cup finely chopped fresh yellow onion
1 finely chopped shallot
3 tbs. organic olive oil
pinch of sea salt
pinch of paprika

Directions: Warm a cast iron skillet over medium heat. Add olive oil. Mix in chopped onion and shallots, stirring occasionally until lightly browned or caramelized. Add in drained cans of chicken, black beans, carrots and peas. Sprinkle with seasonings and stir until thoroughly combined. Cover with lid or aluminum foil. 

 

Depending on the ingredients available to you at home, scoop the meal bowl contents into warm corn tortillas and garnish with a quick squeeze of lime juice, dollop of plain yogurt and sprinkle of shredded cheese. Spoon contents over white or brown rice or enjoy with freshly baked cornbread from your preps! Dry goods are essential to any prepper pantry, and a great place to start.

 

C-Rations, also known as C-Rats, replaced standard WWI military rations in 1938, consisting of hard tack (biscuits), bacon, salt, sugar, coffee and tobacco. Rolling papers were also included.

A fun 1950’s throwback video about the history of canning. Enjoy!

Walking Home Alone After My Car Died,
Lessons Learned from Being Stranded

I ran into trouble recently upon leaving the doctor’s office on a late Friday afternoon. Strapping on my seatbelt, I turned the key to find a dead battery. The instrument panel lit up with each attempt to start the vehicle, followed by a series of clicks. Panic and dread coursed through my body, briefly overwhelming me. It was late afternoon and the five o’clock traffic bustled along the busy street adjacent to the parking lot where I was stranded. 
Surrounded by strangers, I called my spouse and other family members, all who were out of pocket. I popped the hood. Drawing attention to myself, I walked to the front of my car. Behind me a man sitting alone in a beat-up vehicle watched my every move. He could have been waiting for someone. Having been stranger abducted years ago, his presence and the situation reawakened elements of PTSD I’ve lived with for years. 
Consider packing a bugout bag for both home and vehicle. Include water, snacks and medication to start. Think of travel essentials required for an overnight stay away from home.

I never leave home without my NOCO BOOST GB40 multi-purpose jump start lithium battery charger. This device makes an excellent motorist first line of defense. Note: panic and fear in an emergency situation like this can worsen pre-existing physical and mental health conditions. A quick jump may reduce prolonged exposure to the elements and costly towing.

  • Key Features of NOCO BOOSTGB40:
  • Safely start a dead battery in seconds. Up to 20 jumps on a single charge. Rated for gasoline engines up to 6.0 liters. Deisel up to 3.0.
  •  Ultra safe and easy to use without needing to worry about incorrect connections and sparks. Safely connect to any 12-volt vehicle with mistake proof design featuring spark-proof technology and reverse polarity protection.
  • Multi-Function. It’s a car jump starter, portable power bank and LED flashlight. Recharge smart phones, laptops and other USB devices. Easily rechargeable from any powered USB port in 3 hours at 2.1 amps.
  • Advanced Design. Made from high lithium technology. A rugged and water-resistant enclosure. Lightweight. only 2.4 pounds
Immediately, I drew attention from curious onlookers from a major thoroughfare, yet no one rendered aid. My calls home still unreturned, I went back inside my doctor’s office and requested permission to leave my car until I could arrange a tow, disappointed the staff at my doctor’s office failed to offer any assistance. I’ve been a loyal and longtime patient for over a decade.
Earlier in the day, I happened to listen to a survivalist’s podcast encouraging people to consider dressing incognito when running errands to reduce their chance of becoming a target. I took it as a sign and dressed down in comfortable boots, jeans and dark jacket. 
I even tucked in my ponytail and covered my head with an oversized black baseball-cap on the way home. Adrenaline pumping, I set off on foot, vigilantly traversing a series of busy streets, punching crosswalk buttons at every traffic light on the precarious journey home.

Consider packing a pair of sneakers, boots, hat, plain looking change of clothes, raingear and flashlight in an easy to carry backpack. Avoid standing out in a crowd. In an SHTF situation, you’ll need to move to safety with anonymity, confidence and comfort of knowing you have what you need.

About a half-mile into my excursion, I came across a heavily intoxicated homeless man talking to himself approaching a desolate bus stop. I ducked into a busy office until he passed. 
The sun disappeared behind the horizon as the city quickly darkened. I tucked my head down against forceful gusts of north wind announcing the arrival of a cold front. Waiting for the light to change at the last intersection, I noticed a distracted driver stopped at the crosswalk. Proceeding with caution, I crossed the street, circumnavigating around her just in case. 
For short trips around town, consider keeping a small bag packed with items essential to you in order to make a safe return home during an unforseen event.
I was the only pedestrian other than the homeless man for most of the walk. Thia city isn’t very foot-traffic friendly. Our bus stops don’t offer shade and the sidewalks are irreparably fractured. Looking back, I needed a good pair of broken-in hiking boots. I’ll report back as soon as I find a suitable pair!
In my town, the infrastructure is crumblinng beneath our feet.

Walking home alone was challenging. Had I not worn shoes for function, the journey home would have been brutal on my feet and back. Sometimes life throws curveballs to test our resilience through adversity. None of us is exempt from trials by fire.

If you’re contending with health issues or simply can’t afford to take self-defense classes, find at least one method that speaks to you in case you find yourself in an unexpected physical altercation. 
Perpetrators utilize the art of surprise. Let’s turn the tables on them with an unexpected move! If you can’t physically exert due disability or illness, familiarizing yourself with self-defense strategies can be a powerful first step towards personal empowerment. 
Approaching the outskirts of my neighborhood, I worried about potential altercations with the different packs of loose dogs on our street. Recently, animal control was called when two pit bulls terrorized my mother-in-law through a front window of her home. A neighbor down the street witnessed the ordeal, prompting him to call 911. All of us in the area were forced to remain indoors until the animals were captured.
All kinds of things come to mind during a crisis, especially the well being of those you love. Whenever I leave the house, I make sure to leave out extra bowls of water.

Trauma and Chronic Illness, a Power Couple in the Theatre of Afflliction

From birth until death, we are continually bombarded with images of violence and brutality through Hollywood movies, television programming, popular music and in some cases, behavior from family and friends. Many of us have experienced bad behavior from abusive family members, alcoholics, addicts and other members of society. 
While some individuals escape seemingly unscathed from familial/cultural violence, many of us continue to endure long lasting catastrophic physical and emotional repercussions, including mental anguish and unresolved chronic illnesses while still enduring active direct and/or secondary victimization issues. Just because an event happened years ago, doesn’t mean it’s over. 

 

Many experts agree on a set of basic beliefs surrounding the destructive effects of trauma on the brain’s limbic system.  One is the alteration of the electrical circuitry of the brain’s amygdala, one of the two almond-shaped clusters of nuclei located deeply imbedded within the temporal lobes of the brain’s cerebrum. 
Representing the core fear system in humans, the amygdala is directly associated with conditioned fear, an integral part of the brain’s limbic system involved with emotion, memory, and the flight or fight response. 

 

Savory Bone Broth Chicory Root Latte

For those of you sensitive to coffee like me, I created this rich and savory collagen infused chicory root powder latte’.

Ingredients:
1 scoop Dr. Axe Pure Bone Broth Powder
1-2 tsp. chicory root powder
1 tbs. Swerve Brown Sugar (it’s wonderfully sugar free and natural)
Splash of your choice of creamer (I like half-half or cashew milk)

Directions:
Add bone broth powder, sweetener, chicory root powder into favorite mug.
Whisk dry ingredients until fully incorporated.
Add hot water.
Stir well.
Add your choice creamer (optional)
Find a cozy place on your bed, curl up and nourish yourself with your new coffee alternative!

 

 

Off-Grid Window Security System

Avoid placing furniture, garbage cans, and other items underneath or anywhere near your most vulnerable points of entry like the two chairs featured directly below the narrow window. All windows should be considered viable points of entry. In this scenario, a sill lined with cans of change would have spilled onto the floor, alerting whomever occupied the dwelling.
No matter where you live, it’s important to feel safe, especially in a grid down scenario. If you rely solely on home security cameras powered by the grid, you may find yourself stripped of a crucial line of defense when the power goes out. 

Having lived in both apartments and homes, I discovered the windows were typically thin and easily breeched due to wood rot, age and accessibility. Due to the expense of storm window installation, especially glass. many people are at the mercy of saving money when it comes to securing their windows, leaving themselves vulnerable to crime.

 

The simple act of filling empty cans with loose change to line your windowsills can alert you or a pet to an intruder, giving you precious time to reach for a personal protection device, make an escape or call 911.
During the last hurricane, our neighbor informed us of a pocket of widespread looting occurring within a mile from our home. The power was out as predicted, and thieves were on the loose. Later, we discovered that residents had been assaulted.
Serendipitously, I had recently come across an article featured in The Backwoodsman outdoor magazine suggesting filling empty cans with loose change to line the windowsills. https://backwoodsmanmag.com/
 

83% of Would-be burglars check for the presence of an alarm system before attempting to break-in. https://www.thezebra.com/resources/research/burglary-statistics/

Feel free to be creative when designing your off-grid window security system!
Left-over wrapping or wallpaper beautify this simple, DIY window security system. If you don’t have spare change, fill empty cans with bells, shells, cutlery (spoons not knives!), pens, pencils, junk from the doodads drawer or anything else that will make noise if disturbed. 

 

Avoid using glass containers! I found out the hard way when my cat knocked over a large jar full of change off my bedroom windowsill. 

Rustic Healing Simple Creamy Hummus Makes Delicious Meal or Snack

This delicious, five-minute meal is not only nutritious but anti-inflammatory as well. For those of us on the battlefield with chronic illness, storing high-quality canned goods ensures one less unplanned trip to the store.
Don’t let a slump in energy be the reason behind a sudden trip through a fast-food restaurant or convenient store. Instead, discover your creativity and flair for Mediterranean food by using two cans of garbanzo beans from your prepper pantry! This nutritious, high in protein dish will satisfy even the most finicky appetites. 

 

Ingredients:
2 cans garbanzo beans (generic brands are excellent)
3 TBS. tahini
1-2 TBS. olive oil
1 TSP. sea salt
1 TSP. fresh lemon juice (lime juice is an excellent substitute) This is also optional.
1 TSP. fresh or dried parsley flakes (garnish)

 

Directions:
Open and drain two cans of canned garbanzo beans into a bowl. Empty drained beans into a food processor (a high-speed blender will suffice in a pinch). Add olive oil, tahini, salt, lemon juice and splash of reserved fluid from beans. Puree until thick and creamy, careful not to add too much liquid. If product is runny, add in extra beans from a third can if possible.
Scoop out into bowl, drizzle with olive oil and garnish with parsley flakes. Dip your favorite bread or heap onto halved avocadoes. Excellent dip for tortilla chips or toasted Ezekiel bread.

Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ’s sake: for when I am weak, then I am strong.
12 Corinthians 10

Tethered by Fate,
An Unlikely Alliance Between Victim and Offender

A collage of the Green Rive Killer's victims. Sadly, these brave souls lost their battle at the hands of a ruthless monster. While they are immortalized forever in photographs, their fate is forever tied to the merciless soul hunter. I beieve in spiritual justice. In heaven, they will have the last word before God throws away the key to the hellbound maniac.
                    Till Death Do Us Part
One crisp, early spring morning in the early 1990’s nestled inside a dusty, north Texas courtroom, the inescapable net of fate brought together an unlikely duo. One, an aimless north Texas male down on his luck, the other, a weary woman in her twenties with big dreams of working on independent films. 
Upon instruction, the not-so-distant strangers laid hands on the cover of a no-frills, well-sworn Bible, repeating the same oath to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help them God. A week-long trial was officially underway as the small-town, carjacking rapist and his victim stood next to one another other, sweaty palms down, upon the undeniable word of God.
Donning an ill-fitting, grey polyester jailhouse issued suit, I thought he cleaned up fairly well for someone who months earlier terrorized me in a cheap beer induced rage he acquired while getting drunk, devising evil plans to carjack, rape and rob while washing his clothes at the local laundry mat.

 

I never dreamed we would come face to face again in such close proximity. A uniformed bystander might surmise we were getting hitched. In many ways, we were. Married, no. Tethered, yes. 
Surrounded by attorneys, law enforcement, newspaper journalists, presiding judge, family members and incoming jurors, I knew I was safe. Still, the scene was surreal. A local university law student class attended the spectacle, along with people from my past who were suddenly interested in my welfare. The cameras were on and for a blip in time, it was the greatest show on earth.
We both took the stand, he against the advice of his attorney. I watched in disbelief as he lied over and over, providing a false alibi as to his whereabouts the night of the offense. His girlfriend even testified on his behalf, claiming he was in bed with her all night in their trailer on the outskirts of town. Both his and her lengthy criminal records failed to serve them in a positive light, and in the end, a compassionate and intelligent jury found him guilty, sentencing him to a whopping 70 plus years. Hard evidence, including DNA, even in its infancy, sealed the deal. I also successfully identified him from a photo line-up.
Relieved the ordeal was over, I was informed he wouldn’t come up for parole until 2006, a lifetime to me back then. Time to get my life back on track, or so I thought, not fully realizing how enmeshed our lives would continue to be. Oddly, a friend of mine had a brother incarcerated in the same unit as my offender. 
Why do I care? Because paroled sex offenders live amongst us in many neighborhoods around the globe. In my zip code, there are more than 60 high and low risk sex offenders going about their daily lives, subject to keeping in touch with his/her parole officer. 
Crime victims often feel tethered to their offenders. Many assume responsibility to protect society as well as themselves from further damage by participating in parole hearings. Most of us have little to no idea what really goes on behind the scenes of board members and their decsion making process. Many victims yearn to know how the offender behaves and what he/she says at the time of parole review.

More than 600,000 missing persons cases in the United States were entered into the National Crime Information Center records in 2018. https://www.fbi.gov/file-repository/2018-ncic-missing-person-and-unidentified-person-statistics.pdf/view

                        Chain Games
After multiple parole hearings over the years, I had so many questions, many which no one understood why or could answer. People told me, “Get over it! Justice was served. Move on!” I wish it worked that way! No one at victim services or the board could legally inform me of anything revelatory about possible improvement, prison conditions or anything else other than his status as a level one, two or three offender. Recently, however, a representative at victim’s services disclosed my perpetrator’s worsening behavioral issues. I was grateful for the insight. For the first time in twenty years, he was denied his chance at appearing before the board.
I wanted to understand the review process, specific grounds for my offender’s consistent parole deferment, the reasons he gave for considering himself worthy of freedom and why, as of last year, he was disqualified to be reviewed before the board. What kind of behavior was he exhibiting? Had he ever participated in any rehabilitative programs? Did he ever discuss, or demonstrate remorse about perpetrating such a horrific crime? Ultimately, I wondered if me attending these hearings was even helping to keep him behind bars.
Recently, I came across and article detailing the process utilized by the Colorado Department of Corrections parole board members in determining an offender’s parole release eligibility in Denial of Parole: An Inmate Perspective, written by Mary-West Smith, Mark R. Pogrebin and Eric D. Poole from the University of Colorado. https://www.uscourts.gov/federal-probation-journal/2000/12/denial-parole-inmate-perspective 
This interesting study examines the methods used by parole board members in making discretionary decisions about inmates and “the factors that affect their decisions to grant or deny parole.” The majority of the information gathered for this research spans from the mid 1960’s to the mid 1980’s. The authors concentrate specifically on the inmates perspective post parole denial. Apparently, only one other study made in 1977 existed at the time. 
In Colorado, ” a full board review is required for all cases involving a violent crime or for inmates with a history of violence.” Parole is considered a privilege and not a right, something most inmates don’t know or understand. In 1997, the Citizens United for Rehabilitation of Errants (CURE), a non-profit prisoner advocacy group, gathered data from a survey of 128 participants in its quarterly newsletter from inmates detailing complaints resulting from parole denials.
Offenders denied parole typically felt slighted, misunderstood, confused, cheated and in many ways, victimized. The study focuses on inmates who feel they have not only served adequate time, but also that having completed prison self-improvement classes, including successful completion of drug and alcohol recovery groups, and offender re-entry programs makes them suitable for release.   https://www.tdcj.texas.gov/divisions/rpd/index.html 

 

Typically, the offender has no concern whatsoever for the victim. In fact, many fail to mention anything regarding the person he/she injures. The victim is often the only one concerned with the big picture.
When considering release for sex offenders, “…in Colorado [sex offender sentencing laws] have evolved through dramatic changes in legislation over the past several years and a great deal of confusion exists regarding which inmates are eligible for parole, when they are eligible, and what conditions can be imposed when inmates are paroled.”( please see link to referenced article).
 
                               Freedom Busters
A list of the top five complaints submitted by inmates deferred on parole (P.E.D. parole eligibility date) include the following:
1. Inadequate time served. Out of 128 inmates surveyed, 48% expressed the reason issued to them for failure to be paroled was not enough time served. The following account was given by an anonymous inmate denied parole release:
       “If you don’t meet their…time criteria you are ‘not’ eligible. Their time criteria is way more severe than statute…the board is an entity with entirely too much power.” 
2. Completed Required Programs. Despite completing all educational and treatment required programs, 35% of inmates complained their parole was denied based on this factor. In fact, many inmates express a lack of mandatory classes, including long waiting lists for required classes, many which have been discontinued due to a lack of funding. 
Patricia Krenwinkel from the Charles Manson cult back in 1969. In 2022, the California Board of Pardons and Paroles denied her parole. She has served fifty-three years in prison, the longest period of time ever served by a female inmate in the United States.
An excerpt taken from on a prisoner included in the study expressed that when first meeting the board, he received a 10-month setback to complete the classes he was taking. Upon completing them on his own initiative, he was promised a guaranteed release at his upcoming hearing when he was subsequently denied again. One year later, at the next hearing he discovered none of the seven certificates of completion to date were in the file. He stated that despite having completed a difficult 64-week course without write ups, he was issued another one-year setback.

Overall, inmates feel that since they have made the effort to complete suggested coursework in order to rehabilitate themselves that the parole board doesn’t take their attempts seriously. Class and program completion is listed as one of the criteria taken into consideration for parole release. So far, I haven’t heard any mention of the victim by an offender. The disconnect is astounding, especially when one comes up for possible release. 

So far, the top two complaints share a common theme of malignant entitlement. As a survivor, there is no release from the searing pain of rape aftermath. No amount of my life lived, or therapy sessions compensate for the damage done. While I consider myself a survivor, the victim will always live inside me. 
3. Parole Denied Despite Parole Plan. 27% of polled inmates attribute the criteria of having a solid parole plan in place in conjunction with completed required classes and programs along with good institutional behavior as sufficient grounds for favorable review. Typically, the inmate is at a loss for comprehending the board’s justification for continued deferral. To be fair, prisoners admit that having a parole plan alone prepared by both a case manager and inmate is insufficient for re-entry into society.

        “…I was denied parole for the third time by the D.O.C. parole board even though I have completed all recommended classes (Alcohol Ed. I and II, Relapse Prevention, Cognitive Skills and Basic Mental Health.) I have a place to parole to (mother’s house), a good job and a very strong support group consisting of family and friends…to the present date, I have served 75% of my 3-year sentence…”Anonymous Inmate

 From reading the above insight from an incarcerated individual, I gather he committed a crime while under the influence of alcohol, has trouble making responsible decisions and suffers from an undisclosed mental disorder. Since this was his failed third attempt, I imagine this individual has little to no impulse control and unable to control his drinking. The inmate admits to completing a cognitive skills class, which often address aggression, anger management and issues with authority.   https://ssir.org/articles/entry/a_better_way_to_keep_people_from_going_back_to_prison
One of the main reasons for sharing these common complaints is to enlighten you about the staggering, maladjusted population of individuals you may come face to face with one day. While they’re out of sight, out of mind for a time, some for life, many develop worsening anger, frustration and an overwhelming sense of betrayal toward the very system seemingly preparing them for freedom, making a chronically deferred inmate potentially not only more dangerous, but more likely to recidivate. 

However, if we turn a blind eye to the over 2 million people incarcerated in prisons throughout the United States, https://www.prisonpolicy.org/reports/pie2023.html, we must be cognizant of a population of individuals who, when released back into society, feel slighted by the judicial system, prison system and society itself. 
(If you feel led to support my work, the following is a link to my PayPal account. My goal is to prepare you as best I can for the daunting challenges unfolding in our increasingly unstable world. Your support is appreciated. Thank you)

PayPal Link: https://paypal.me/rustichealing?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US

A sad state of affairs. In Texas, over 4,000 geriatric inmates (55 and older) have been denied medical parole. To qualify for this, an inmate must be too incapacitated to pose a threat to public safety and have months to live. In Texas, only one-quarter of terminally ill inmates have qualified for medical release. Photograph of a geriatric ward in the Estelle Unit near Huntsville, Texas.
4. Parole Board Composition and Behavior. According to the study, twenty-one percent of the inmates complained about receiving a negative parole outcome due to having the decision made by only one board member whose background may be considered partially to blame. 
In other words, the board member assigned to the case may be influenced by personal factors, or simply biased towards the inmate. Incarcerated individuals also expressed a trend of bad behavior displayed by parole board members towards inmate family members, including the use of intimidation tactics.
 ...The man [parole board member] usually comes alone and talks to the women worse than any verbal abuser I have ever heard. He always says horrible things to them about how bad they are and usually reduces them to tears…Anonymous Inmate

Throughout the United States, keeping quality prison staff has become a growing crisis, giving the low-pay and grueling nature of the work. According to The Marshall Project, the Georgia Smith State Prison houses 1500 men, with each shift requiring at least 30 officers to guard them.   https://www.themarshallproject.org/2024/01/10/prison-correctional-officer-shortage-overtime-data

A newly hired prison guard revealed he, along with fellow colleagues, were forced to pull 16 hour shifts five days a week. He went on to state,

“The mandatory overtime combined with constant violence against both staff and incarcerated people, led officers to quit…The place was too brutal, too disgusting.”

#5. Family need for Inmate Support Ignored. Unfortunately, family and children in relation to the inmate suffer the most when a loved one resides behind bars. 17% of prisoners listed this complaint as a major issue upon parole deferment. Offenders often expressed an urgent need upon release to care for children and elderly parents.

 

“[My 85-year-old mother] has no one. Her doctor also wrote [to the chair of the parole board] as well as other family members, including my son. All begging for my release. She needs me!…Being good and trying hard in here doesn’t count for much…Anonymous Inmate

 

The Texas Department of Criminal Justice is experiencing an extremely high turnover rate, with burn out being listed as the number one reason. Staff shortages, insufficient pay and violent working conditions make guarding a facility similar to enemy combat. Facilities are often located in the middle of nowhere, de-incentivizing potential job candidates. https://www.prisonlegalnews.org/news/2023/jan/1/guards-fleeing-texas-prisons/

"Wherefore doth the way of the wicked prosper? wherefore are all they happy that deal very treacherously? Thou hast planted them, yea, they have taken root: they grow, yea, they bring forth fruit: thou art near in their mouth, and far from their reins." Jeremiah 12:1-2
While there are several additional complaints filed by inmates, the central theme lies in offenders feeling victimized not only by the parole board members, but by the criteria set forth to achieve freedom. It must be extraordinarily painful to witness a board member behave abusively towards a loved one and not have the means to protect or stand up for that individual. No one deserves to be abused or disrespected, especially by a professional in the field of justice.

 

Still, I find it glaring the victims’ welfare is never mentioned or considered by the offender. This chronic lack of empathy or connection to both the crime and injured party is indicative of the problem in the first place. The victim is simply an end to the means; a forcibly dehumanized vessel for monetary gain, outlet for rage, and forced sexual dominion, including homicide with no regard for human life or lifelong aftermath of perpetrated violence.
According to the study, “Release decisions made by the parole board appear to be largely subjective …The emphasis on past and current crimes indicates that inmates, regardless of their institutional adjustment or progress in treatment, vocational or educational programs, will continue to be denied parole until they have been sufficiently punished for their crimes.”(Denial of Parole: An Inmate Perspective)

Simple Salmon Burgers Make Supper Time Special

Grilled salmon patties cook best in a well-seasoned cast iron skillet. Heat your pan on medium high then add a generous pour of avocado, coconut or olive oil before adding patties to ensure optimal browning.
Stocking up on quality, high protein canned goods is essential for survival during a crisis. One of my favorite dishes is hearty salmon burgers made from canned salmon. Grilled in a cast iron skillet, these can be enjoyed sandwiched between hamburger buns, or Ezekiel bread. (Any whole wheat bread will do, or if you’re like me, enjoy alone over a scoop of mashed potatoes, bed of fresh greens or with avocado slices.)

 

Ingredients:
2 cans canned of drained salmon (refrigerate for 1-2 hours if possible, or place cans in freezer for 20 minutes prior)
1 whole yellow onion (small is fine)
1 bulb shallot
1 cup olive oil (any oil will do in a pinch)
1 cup breadcrumbs (finely chopped crackers is fine)
2 whole eggs
glug Worster Shire Sauce
1 tbs. dill (fresh/dried)
1 tbs. Old Bay seasoning (optional)
1-2 tsp. lemon juice
1-2 tsp. sea salt
1 cup thawed frozen peas or 1 cup drained can.

 

Two of my favorite pantry staples. if possible, store 2-4 cans in the refrigerator to whip up delcious dalmon salad or to make the yummy burgers at a moments notice. Salmon burgers are srumptious over mashed potatoes, and will keep you satisfied during any crisis.
Note: This is a very forgiving recipe. The basic salmon patty steak typically requires simply the canned salmon, eggs, bread/cracker crumbs and seasonings of your choice.)

 

Directions:
Open and drain canned salmon, empty contents into large mixing bowl.
Cover with plastic wrap or cup towel and return to refrigerator.
Finely chop yellow onion and shallot (you may substitute with garlic/onion powder)
Heat iron skillet over medium-medium high heat.
Add 1/2 cup olive oil (oil of your choice) to cast iron skillet. 
Add chopped onion and shallots, stirring occasionally with wooden spoon or metal spatula until caramelized.
Remove from heat.
Remove chilled salmon from the fridge and add in 2 slightly beaten eggs, Woster Shire, dried/fresh herbs, Old Bay, breadcrumbs, lemon juice, salt and peas.
Add warm caramelized onions and shallots into mixture and combine by hand until well incorporated. 
Note: If you prefer, you may refrigerate combined ingredients overnight, but I have found it unnecessary unless I’m planning the next day’s meal.

Note: Before reheating skillet over medium/medium high heat, wipe out leftover grilled onion/shallots with dry paper towel to keep oil clean.
Directions:
Add remaining olive oil to heated skillet/pan.
Form patties into desired shape, size and thickness (my family prefers larger burgers)
Carefully place 2 medium/large salmon patties into sizzling skillet, covering with mesh fry guard to prevent grease splash.
Cook patties for about 4 minutes each side, until golden brown, longer for darker, crispier crust.
Remove burgers from skillet, placing on paper towel to soak up extra oil.
Plate and Serve
Top with my special creamy yogurt sauce. Recipe below.
Creamy Homemade Sweet Pickle Yogurt Sauce

 

Ingredients:
I cup plain, whole fat yogurt (I prefer Chobani or Fage’)
1/2 cup sweet pickle relish (you may substitute with fresh chopped whole sweet pickles from your pantry)
1 TBS. olive/avocado oil.
tsp. finely chopped/dried dill weed.
dash cracked pepper. (optional)
1/4 cup fresh chopped peeled cucumber (optional)

 

Directions:
In small bowl, mix yogurt, relish, oil, dill, pepper and cucumbers until thoroughly combined.
Spoon dollop over top of hot salmon burger and enjoy!

Surviving Stranger Abduction
Keeping Evil Behind Bars
Part 1

Every few years, my offender comes up for parole. It’s unnerving to say the least. The thought of him being released into the general public is nothing short of a nightmare. The violent one who conquered my flesh is currently serving more than seventy years in a Texas prison. For more than a decade, I took solace in the span of time before his first official hearing. 
I felt the presence of evil looming in the distance back then, not fully realizing the magnitude of the cross God have given me to bear. I participated in sensitivity training programs for high risk incarcerated youth, hoping to be part of the solution by sharing my story of survival and the hardships of recovery. The program has since been discontinued.
Feeling like my life was somewhat back on track, I landed a prestigious job with the state, I became friends with our office secretary, a young woman close in age. Soon, I would learn her brother was not only incarcerated with my offender, but best friends with him. He had even earned an endearing nickname. 
As a direct result of the uncanny connection, I chose to leave my job, a common high-risk behavior typical of violent crime victims. My friend frequently wrote to her brother, dropping intelligence about me. Once, she produced a letter from her incarcerated sibling. Inside the hand-written letter, he stated his friend (my offender) communicated with her brother, curious about the girl in the office…me.
This strange coincidence left me wondering if I would ever experience a fresh start anywhere or be able to hold a job for any more than a two- year period. These issues are hallmark examples of what crime victims go through in the quest for living a normal life uninterrupted by the aftershocks of violence. PTSD rears its ugly head at the most inopportune times, affecting all areas of one’s life, with few, if anyone in the victims former or present hemisphere of support able to understand, comfort or help. Truthfully, you’re on your own. No one can fix you. Don’t expect other people to understand, unless they’ve been on the battlefield. It’s up to you to get better, and the good news is YOU CAN! https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/post-traumatic-stress-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20355967
Vetting out a qualified therapist or counselor is a good place to start. If finances are an issue, many therapists offer sliding scale fees. In Texas, a crime victim can apply for victim’s compensation. When I was abducted, I was working and attending college while sharing an apartment with my best friend. The following day, everything changed. 
Crime victims often drop out of society. You might see them homeless, addicted to drugs or alcohol, or never see them again. Know their circuitry is altered, much like an electrical short in a fuse box. A switch has more than likely been flipped from a heightened fight or flight, live or die response that typically requires medical and psychological attention. There’s zero shame in how one survives.

Lavender oil may modulate GABAA receptors https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5437114/

Brain imaging studies reveal lavender oil stimulates brain arousal and feelings of relaxation. Derived from sustainably harvested and distilled extractions from flowers, lavender is highly effective in stimulating the part of the brain responsible for regulating the limbic system, the region responsible for emotions. 
Lavender oil is “suggested to modulate GABAA receptors and enhance inhibitory tone of the nervous system.   https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3612440/  
Studies have shown proven neuroprotective properties lavender has on the nervous system and cognitive abilities by activating the parasympathetic nervous system.

 

Nature surrounds us with her beauty and medicinal properties to sooth frayed nerves and weary spirit. By applying several drops of lavender oil in a diffuser, aromatherapy necklace or directly onto the skin, studies show the body responds, sending signals from the brain to the nervous system promoting calmness, peace and reduced anxiety.

 

I prefer Eden’s Garden essential oils for diffusing and topical application. https://a.co/d/gGZ3f47 I am not sponsored by this company.
                              Hijacked Brain
One of the many difficult aspects of surviving a violent crime is the prolonged state of shock the body and mind experience after an attack. After the first few years, I was unable to discuss it without laughing and minimalizing brutal details. Family members and friends scoffed at why I didn’t put up a better fight, scream or yell, admonishing me over my passive reaction. https://hms.harvard.edu/news/why-many-rape-victims-dont-fight-or-yell  
Freezing occurs when the amygdala, a crucial structure in the brain’s fear circuitry, detects an attack and signals the brainstem to inhibit movement. https://justiceresearch.dspacedirect.org/items/fc975c82-8e89-49e9-becd-0038bf86999c
I wasn’t prepared for blacking out from PTSD. https://www.goodrx.com/conditions/ptsd/ptsd-signs-symptoms I was in a drugstore in Austin when two homeless men entered. Looking filthy and disheveled, they triggered me into a state of sudden, primal fear. The last thing I remembered was coming to in the parking lot, trying to find my vehicle. The female pharmacist ran after me in concern. https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/what-are-ptsd-triggers
She recognized what was happening and calmed me down. I was shaking violently and couldn’t see. My vision was gone. For a moment, I thought I had gone blind. Everything was dark as I was feeling the backs of parked vehicles in search for my car. The kind lady handed me my keys and purse. In the midst of fright, I dropped my personal belongings and fled the drugstore. She hugged me until I regained my sight. I will never forget the violet sunset gleaming in the autumn sky as we huddled beneath it. Fall was in the air.
The agony is in having to relive, relay and convince a third party that a violent predator should continue to spend the rest of his life behind bars. It stirs up a part of your mind that typically stays settled. Revisiting past trauma means kicking up old memories, fueling nightmares and languishing too long in the reservoir of yesteryear. He stole my fate, freedom and dignity. Soon, our intertwined destiny will be determined by a board of strangers. (please scroll down for part 2)
In the 1920's, armed robbers began intercepting vehicles used by bootleggers transporting liquor, giving birth to a burgeoning new era of crime known as carjacking.

“Carjacking is spur of the moment. The offender sees a vulnerable target and an opportunity to strike…anybody driving a car in public is potentially at risk…”  https://knowablemagazine.org/content/article/society/2023/understanding-carjacking

10 Ways to Reduce Your Chances of Being Abducted by a Stranger

1. Avoid Routines: Take alternate routes when driving home or venturing on errands, Predators frequent the watering holes via parking lots. Like alligators in a swamp, they stalk and thrive on catching someone unaware, often within seconds. For many missing persons, there are few witnesses if any to the crime. 
No one was around when my offender snatched me from my apartment parking lot, despite the event occurring under a brightly lit streetlamp. At least once a week, alter your regular routes or routines. Harness your personal power by becoming stealth. This single act can turn a victim into a survivor. Be the purveyor of surprise, not the receiver. 
2. Screen and selectively choose/hire the people working around your home or office: Run a criminal check and ask for references for service people. Use your intuition. Do you have a bad feeling about someone or someplace? Can you defend yourself inside the home? Is the person who arrived to help you dressed nicely/appropriately for the job? Do you feel threatened? https://www.yourlocalsecurity.com/blog/home-service-safety-tips/
3. Make friends or get acquainted with your neighbors: Depending on the neighborhood, take mental note of who lives where, what cars are regularly parked etc. Nowadays, getting to know your neighbors can be risky. Use your best judgement. In my neighborhood, there is at least one resident who peeks through the blinds and relays the comings and goings to my sister-in-law down the street. If you’re homebound like me, chances are you’re alert to unusual activity. If not, hardwired, outdoor security cameras can provide important surveillance, can be run off of a generator and don’t rely on Wifi.
4. Secure your home: Check into installing hardwired and/or remote security cameras, new locks on doors and check the condition of all windows. Is your dwelling’s interior easily breeched? Specialized 2-1 Security Bars by SECURITYMAN provide excellent reinforcement to front, back and side doors from being breeched, as well as sliding glass doors and windows. https://amzn.to/3KkXsJR
5. Keep emergency numbers written down: Make a physical list of health care providers telephone and fax numbers. Don’t rely on storing every contact digitally. Make it a practice to acquire business cards. Keep a journal of local police, fire and rescue numbers along with your medical issues and current medications. Write down important contacts. In an emergency, it’s natural to panic and become disoriented when suddenly two plus two isn’t adding up to four. Logic and reasoning are the first to go during a crisis.
Informative video showcases a stranger abduction scenario with a highly effective, preventative solution. 
6. Check your surroundings before leaving home/and or any establishment/maintaining situational awareness: I cannot express enough the importance of surveying an area before physically leaving (walking) or driving away. Take time to study the battlefield. In the theatre of life, there are many types of warzones and combatants eagerly enlisted. 
Make sure you’re aware of the players on stage right, left, front and center. I noticed the creepy perp right away lurking in the grocery store parking lot that fateful night, immediately knowing he was up to no good. (My gut told me earlier that morning that I needed to stay home. home.)   https://minutesmatter.upmc.com/why-being-aware-of-your-surroundings-is-important-when-emergencies-happen/
Ladies and gentlemen, please be cognizant of other drivers pulling up next to you and people on foot, including the homeless, joggers and random people walking without purpose or direction, sans personal belongings or appearing intoxicated. Possible carjackers and kidnappers are seeking distracted, solo vehicle operators engaged on their phones, fixing their make-up or focused on the car stereo. Perpetrators can spot passive, vulnerable women or men from a distance, as many spend all day cruising for unwitting victims least likely to put up a fight. 
7. Avoid walking alone in isolated areas: While this may seem obvious, you may be surprised at how often you engage in this activity. An isolated area is a place apart from regular, human activity where people come and go, live, work and recreate such as a city, community or village. I liken it to a place a dog takes his bone or a natural predator, such as a lion, carries off his prey; to areas consisting of caves, ravines, fields or abandoned buildings. Getting you alone is the predator’s modus operandi. 
Are you taking walks in isolated areas such as densely wooded city parks or along rural county roads? Do you shop in areas where multiple retail spaces are empty? Take inventory of the place you frequent off the beaten path. If you love taking spontaneous trips, be sure to notify someone who can follow up with your safe travels.

 

In a perfect world, women and men should be able to traverse through the wilderness of a national park alone without fear of harm or duress. This is a common misconception throughout human history. Many YouTube channels irresponsibly promote solo van life for women of all ages, promising full-time wilderness adventures while touting its safety without properly warning against real life dangers present in society. Nature is enthralling, awesome and spellbinding, the grim reality of the laws of the jungle deftly camouflaged beneath its alluring surface.   https://www.mensjournal.com/adventure/is-it-smart-or-safe-for-women-to-go-hiking-alone
Concerned about walking alone with your dog? The simple technique in this video might be a great place to start. For added security and prevention, arm yourselves with alternate methods, including pepper spray, a taser or firearm. The more mentally and physically prepared you are, the less likely you are to be kidnapped or assaulted. Predators typically take the path of least resistance.
8. Attract attention: If you suspect you’re being pursued, make commotion. Keep an air horn in your purse, a whistle on your key chain or lean on the horn if you’re inside your vehicle. Shout “GET BACK”, extending your hand forward to anyone violating your personal space you feel threatened by. This noisy display will typically draw attention from a crowd, depending on your location. 
From personal experience, do not count on your neighbors to always hear or render aid. Acting boldly with confidence and assertion can mean the difference in deterring a would-be kidnapper. Be certain to have the means to defend your life. Drawing attention to yourself can buy you precious time to escape or draw your weapon of choice. Arming yourself with the ability to protect your life is crucial in preventing stranger abduction. Once you’ve been captured, your chances of survival and being freed are nil. https://www.crime-safety-security.com/survival-options-kidnapping.html
9. Avoid wearing expensive jewelry and luxurious gadgets: While celebrities and elite flaunt million-dollar jewels, expensive lifestyles and couture clothing, they’re typically surrounded by armed bodyguards. For the most part, the rest of us depend on ourselves for protection. Regardless, a would-be kidnapper can be motivated by inexpensive rings, watches, purses or vehicles. Keeping this in mind, be mindful of the jewelry and clothing you’re wearing to work or special event.  https://markhamspecialrisks.com/typical-victims-of-a-kidnapping/

 

I later learned from law enforcement about a network of thieves driving in semi-trucks and regular pick-up trucks scouring for female driver’s wedding rings and men’s high-end watches on interstates. Next time you stop at a gas station, be aware of who’s sitting idly behind the wheel. If you feel you’ve been followed, let someone inside a travel mart know. If you’re fearful exiting your vehicle, don’t hesitate to call 911. https://www.star-telegram.com/news/local/crime/article269153872.html

 

My kidnapper noticed my beat-up Louis Vuitton handbag that was at least 20 years old. Once I was in his custody, he violently pulled at my gold, high school graduation ring. My finger was swollen, rendering him unsuccessful. In the end, he dumped me in a rural area, absconding in my vehicle. He stole everything, including textbooks, purse and wallet, and an old super 8 movie camera that belonged to my deceased mom. 
Ted Bundy lured many young, beautiful unsuspecting women to their death by expertly pulling on the heartstrings.
10. Don’t talk to strangers: One of the most difficult aspects in maintaining your personal safety is to stop engaging with people you don’t know. While many of us are personable, nice, sweet and kind, more than willing to help a stranger, you never know what trap is being laid before you or what motive someone has. Back in the 1970’s, infamous serial kidnapper, killer and rapist, Ted Bundy, also known as the Deliberate Stranger, was an expert at luring women to his vehicle by feigning injury or engine trouble. https://www.biography.com/crime/ted-bundy

 

Be wary of women and/or men in need. Once, I was driving home after a long day at work. I noticed a young female in her early twenties waving her arms trying to summon help. I stopped my car and rolled the window down. Looking disheveled and frightened, she concocted a desperate, nonsensical story through a tearful, reddened face. I told her to get inside, feeling sorry for her and drove, slowing at the upcoming, yellow traffic light. To my right at the intersection, an older male was waiting, having sighted his accomplice in the front seat. Dressed nicely and behaving in an unthreatening manner, his eyes and shifty stance told a different story. 

 

My heart leapt into my throat when she commanded me to stop the car next to him. After opening the passenger side door, the female’s hysterics immediately faded as she attempted to adjust the bucket seat further back, making room for the man loitering on the corner, so he could easily gain access. 
While the perpetrating duo amicably conversed, I floored the engine and sped away, my hands violently trembling and sweaty on the steering wheel. The passenger side door slammed shut in the wake of escape. I drove several miles away from the entrance to my apartment to be on the safe side. I recall the attractive, unassuming male appeared stunned, realizing he had been made. Where was his car? Why were they appealing to single, female, solo drivers? Why couldn’t they resolve their own issues? https://krazykillers.wordpress.com/2013/05/05/dangerous-deadly-devious-duos/

 

Skilled predators can look like everyone else and work in tandem. Serial killers and rapist have been known to hold positions of wealth and status, serving as pastors in church. https://people.com/crime/killer-clergy-men-of-the-cloth-who-murdered-their-congregants/ Avoid small talk, responding to compliments or questions designed to distract you. Don’t worry about coming off as rude or unsympathetic. Your life depends on it.
Brave women who survived Ted Bundy’s brutality share their stories in this short video. Often, the kidnappings occurred in broad daylight. Nick named “Little Teddy,” he was anything but, seeking young college co-eds at Florida State University, bars and women hitchhiking or walking on foot, following them home or luring them inside his infamous yellow, VW Bug.

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Return Home Fearlessly. Monitor Your Home/Apartment/RV and Talk to Pets When You're Away at The Store or Doctor's Appointment. Blink Mini Two Camera Set Up Will Alert You to Activity.

One of the ways I began to enhance my personal security and prepare for the unexpected after many years of stress and crippling anxiety following the violent crime was to install BLINK indoor cameras in various rooms inside the home. If my husband or other family members were out of town or away, and I had to leave, I would be instantly notified via cell phone of any activity going on inside before re-entering my residence.

 

Benefits of this simple, plug in camera set up: speak, hear, listen and talk to people and pets from your smart phone with Blinks Mini live view and two-way audio. Tell you’re fur baby when you’re on the way home!
Before setting up an indoor monitoring system, I dreaded coming home to an empty house. I learned from a professional in law enforcement how to clear a home for added self-empowerment. Prepare for the unexpected in simple ways. Your life and well-being depend on you taking charge of your health and personal safety.

Surviving Stanger Abduction
Keeping Evil Behind Bars
Pt. 2

Like Micheal Myers in the Halloween series, the knife wiedling offender who tried to killed me resurfaces every few years. The brutal crime occurred in October, two weeks before all hallow's eve.
No word from the parole board yet, so I think I’ll start journaling daily until the hearing, as it’ll come without warning. Today was difficult. The facial pain returned on both sides, and I’m nauseated from the meds. All of this started five years ago, several months before the last hearing. Unsure what to do, the lightning strike nerve pain made it impossible to touch my face, brush my teeth or eat anything that wasn’t soft. Searing inflammation spread throughout my internal organs like an uncontrolled wildfire.

 

When the wind blew or my husband kissed me on the cheek, I dropped to my knees. The stabbing sensation and fiery internal temperature made my life a living hell. I called the dentist who referred me to a facial pain specialist. (I go into this in more detail in several articles at the bottom of this blog) As I filled out the voluminous patient history forms in the waiting room, one of the questions inquired of past facial or neck injury or trauma. 

 

At the time I was in such acute, unremittent pain, I hurried past the question, hastily checking “no”. I didn’t have time to rehash the past. Once I was in the dental chair and the doctor began probing, I reluctantly admitted I’d received serious trauma to my face, jaw and neck. Unfazed, he coldly responded that I needed to “chill out”, “loosen up” and even have a drink. This nonchalant attitude is prevalent in medical, educational and societal institutions. Desperate for relief, I kept the pain of dismissal to myself. 
I’ve never mentioned to the Texas Board of Pardons and Paroles, victim services or past doctors about the magnitude of head and neck trauma I received at the hands of the perpetrator. This time I plan to divulge the heinous details during the upcoming hearing concerning the devastating financial, physical and emotional toll of receiving facial battery. The shock wave of making the connection and still contending with the painful brutality of trigeminal neuralgia is a reminder not only of the crime, but of the lifelong consequences of violence. 

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He that shall endure to the end, the same shall be saved.
Matthew 24:13

A week before I was kidnapped, a friend of mine led me to Christ. We were riding in his vehicle to an event across town when he grabbed my hand and asked me if I was saved. I told him I was a Christian and thought I was. He said that wasn’t enough and in the bumpy ride on the pocked asphalt enveloped in the October darkness, he led me to Jesus and saved me. 
A feeling of relief mixed with fright scared me. My friend, Paul, never smiled. With tears in his eyes, he said he was worried about me. I could have never imagined one week later I would be absconded in my own vehicle to what felt like my impending death. There is no feeling in the world like the sheer terror of being at the mercy of a madman. 
My nervous system is shot from that event alone. There’s much more to the story, but he is a major contributor to the detriment to my health. These issues will be addressed soon at the upcoming hearing. Dear reader, I thank you for allowing me to reveal the painful aspects of surviving violent crime. No one ever truly “gets over it”. Anyone who tells you otherwise is lying or lacks genuine empathy. 
The risk of an adult woman being kidnapped is 1/200,000. http://boards.straightdope.com/t/risk-of-adult-woman-being-abducted/508888 While it’s fine to take comfort in statistics, don’t ever rest your laurels on them. 
"Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in ditresses for Christs' sake: for when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:10
The Following Evening…

 

It’s after midnight when the compressor nudges the window unit awake. The small table lamp momentarily dims before a delicious cool stream of air wraps around me and my cat purring softly on my lap. My husband lightly snores after a hectic day at the office. Earlier this evening, we took his mother out to dinner for her birthday at a nice restaurant, where a young couple with their beautiful newborn baby girl seated next to us slept like an angel in her stroller. Every now and then, the father picked her up and held her close, proudly kissing her face. 
It made me miss my father. I fought to hold back tears. I wanted the new papa to promise never to release his precious daughter into the insane asylum of this world. 
The nighttime heat and humidity have stolen my appetite. Looking through the bedroom window, feathery grey, low level cumulus clouds skirt across the sky beneath a moonless night, when typical fight or flight fantasies formulate in my mind. Living in a fantasy after experiencing a violent attack is extremely common for victims of violent crime. It’s a natural survival mechanism…
…If he’s released, I’ll head to the Pacific northwest region where an off-grid cabin tucked miles off the main highway basks in fragrant pines and picturesque mountain views. The wood burning stove, deep water well, garden and cellar with plenty of preserved food make it the ideal hideaway. I’ll make my escape travelling incognito, disguising myself like a man wearing oversized clothes, tuck my long hair under a John Deere cap, and don a pair of dark aviators for a final, masculine touch. My friend Carl, a truck driver on a perpetual quest to find his daughter’s killer, offered me a ride to my sequestered destination. 
Once I get there and get settled, I’ll go for long walks in the woods and cast a fishing line in a nearby stream. As the birds fly overhead and the wildlife calls, I regret every moment away from my family, home, husband, doodle, Maine Coon and fear-based decision to flee.
I’m finished running, “For God hath not given us a spirit of fear; but of power and of love, and of sound mind.” 2 Timothy 1:7 KJV Besides, I don’t really have a cabin in the woods. I live in an old house in the city surrounded by thousands of survivors, predators, and regular, everyday non-threatening folk living good old-fashioned ordinary lives, having gladly traded my escape digs for the full armor of God. 
By the way, Carl is one of the main characters in a novel in progress. 
Sweet dreams. Until tomorrow (to be continued).
 

Mother Meets with Daughter's Killer Supporting His Parole Release

The following story features a mother on a mission to advocate for her murdered daughter’s killer to be released from maximum security prison. I’m on the fence with her decision, reading later on in a published article, that she had mixed feelings after his release. In fact, she abruptly stopped all communication with him. 
He wrote to her frequently, often sending her pictures of his new life, including girlfriend, new apartment and a photo of him proudly displaying a large deep- sea fish he caught hanging from a stinger, hooked through the lip.   https://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/crime/2015/06/gary_brown_and_linda_white_he_killed_her_daughter_she_found_a_way_to_forgive.html
The criminal is humanized in this compelling story of forgiveness and letting go. Women, please consider arming yourselves. Get familiar with your weapon of choice. Don’t go anywhere alone at night unless it’s an emergency. In my opinion, the mother is blinded by Stockholm syndrome, unnaturally bonding with the perpetrator, even including him in family jailhouse prison pictures. Ultimately, all of this closeness with the sobbing, seemingly repentant, ruthless killer negated her ability to consider the danger he presents to society. 
Keep your pantry well stocked, medications filled and gas up at the station during the day. Most importantly, listen to your intuition before leaving the home. Take the time to check how you’re feeling, if you’re immune system is down or if you’re overly tired. Our bodies are hardwired to protect us and heal us in times of distress and sickness. 
Avoid taking unnecessary risk, like going to a bar to meet up with friends or hanging out late at night in someone else’s home you know little about. Women are more vulnerable than men and frequently trust too easily, trying to please everyone. We have to protect ourselves and realize that even though we’re free to live our lives, pursue careers and dreams, we need to “Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour:” 1 Peter 5:8

Take Your Mind off Your Worries by Painting Beautiful Flowers with CRAFTBARN 2 DIY Framed Canvas Paint by Numbers for Beginners

No Rinse Shampoo and Conditioning Cap by Nurture is Perfect for Bedridden and Debilitated Folks (like us!). Steer Clear from a Slip and Fall. Cap is Pre-Soaked with Soothing Ingredients for a Quick and Easy "Shampoo Night" Anytime!

Healing Lyme By Stephen Buhner is Singularly the Best Reference Guide for Treating, Healing and Living with Lyme and Other Co-Infections

No matter how far into your Lyme disease ordeal, Healing Lyme will undoubtedly be the most important, informative and enlightening book you’ll ever read regarding the planets fastest growing vector born illness. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7126666/ 

 

A third-generation plant medicine specialist, Dr. Stephen Harold Buhner, a Lyme sufferer, penned many natural healing books on utilizing invasive plant species, herbs, vitamins, minerals and supplements such as glutathione and collagen to rebuild your immune system. He suggests plants are highly intelligent and intuitively synergistic. In other words, they know what to do inside your body.

 

I owe much of my healing, knowledge and peace of mind to Mr. Buhner for his dedication to an illness that has been mostly disregarded and ignored in both the major news media and medical professionals. Please consider adding Healing Lyme to your home reference library. 
Unfortunately, we lost a legacy in December 2022 when he passed from pulmonary fibrosis. He is sorely missed but through masterful research and Avant Garde literary works, this third-generation plant medicine specialists’ legacy will undoubtedly instill hope for future generations, as well as for those of us persistently by the medical community.

Rustic Healing Red Lentil Pasta with Peas

Don't let a chronic illness keep you from feeding yourself healthy, vitamin packed gourmet meals. My husband and family love red lentil spaghetti night. The sky is the limit with basic, wholesome ingredients and a pinch of creativity!
This delicious anti-inflammatory, one skillet meal is hearty and simple to make. Be sure to stock-up on high quality pasta and frozen or canned vegetables for sophisticated, easy suppers to enjoy at home. This dish is excellent for your prepper pantry and has saved me more times than I can remember. You don’t have to go hungry late at night or sit in a fast- food line with simple, nutritious foods prepared with your own hands.

Ingredients:
1 box Red Lentil Spaghetti noodles
1 can green peas or 1 bag frozen peas 
1 cup shredded parmesan cheese (pre-shredded or shaved is fine)
1 tbs sea salt
3 tbs organic olive oil
1-2 tsp. Better then Boullion Vegetable Paste Broth

Directions:
Boil 3-4 quarts (large pot) of filtered water/ add tsp. sea salt
Place Red Lentil pasta into boiling, salted water, stirring noodles occasionally with wooden spoon.
Boil for 12-17 minutes, or until desired tenderness.
Add 1-2 tbs. olive oil to medium heated skillet.
Add drained can of peas or small bag of thawed frozen peas (run frozen peas under hot water in strainer to thaw in a pinch)
saute’ peas for several minutes, then turn skillet on low heat.
Shredd parmesan, set aside
After pasta is cooked, drain water and empty into skillet
turn heat back to medium
add last tbs. olive oil and 2 tbs. of Better then Bouillion Vegetable Paste
Toss well in skillet with non-stick tongs, incorporating ingredients
Serve on warm plate
Garnish with parmesan
Pair with mineral water or herbal tea
For added flavor, finely chop small shallot and saute’ until translucent or caramelized, then add peas. 

Top Three Emergency Items for Homebound Individuals

It may seem impossible to even think about emergency preparedness when you’re suffering from an illness. Let’s face it, being chronically ill is a full- time job when you’re dedicated to getting well, not to mention exhausting. People often think we have nothing but time, and plenty of it…The truth is, many of us have yet to experience a day off. 

 

For those of us homebound, there is no better time than now to ensure we can make it safely through a crisis. Whether it be an unexpected power outage at night or inclement weather we need to venture out in on the way to a doctor’s appointment, there are a few basic survival items we all need just in case.

#1. Tactical Flashlight
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Gear Light is a small business brand.

         Let There Be Light

Something as simple as a dependable, waterproof tactical flashlight in an emergency can mean the difference between fumbling around in the dark, unable to find simple everyday items such as prescriptions, house/car keys, light switches and other preparedness items.

 PERFECT FOR DOG WALKING, UNLOCKING DOOR AT NIGHT, SEARCHING FOR NECESSITIES IN PURSE/BACKPACK.
BRIGHT, DURABLE, COMPACT, THESE TACTICAL LED FLASHLIGHTS (2 PER ORDER) INCLUDE HANDSTRAPS, AND HOLDER CASE.

This high lumen flashlight also comes with an operation guide and a 1-year warranty.
This S1000 lumen flashlight fits securely around your wrist, is lightweight enough to carry/conceal in a purse, glovebox, nightstand or pocket of a robe or sweatshirt and requires one lithium AAA battery per device. 

Don’t get caught in the dark without a means to navigate safely to your vehicle or throughout your home during a crisis.

#2. NOAA Weather Radio
FosPower Weather Radio Rated Best Seller

FosPower 2000mAh Weather Radio is a Small Business Product sold on Amazon
            Listen to Some Swing
During the 2021 Texas winter storm, the grid suffered a major collapse. Without electricity and internet, we were severed from the outside world. Thinking our NOAA weather radio was most valuable during hurricane season, we relied on it as our only means of information during the historic, worst weather-related catastrophe on record in Texas as an estimated 700 lives were lost due to freezing temperatures.

 

Important storm and cold temperature warnings were issued for days, as well as news of statewide infrastructure failures, including homes flooding, business closures, and up to the minute updates on highway conditions. We also enjoyed listening to various radio programs at night for entertainment.
FosPower’s AM/FM/LED Flashlight emergency radio provides 3 power sources when you need a boost of power or need to recharge the radio. The radio’s crank lever and solar panel are both capable of regenerating enough power to keep the radio, lights and SOS alarm. AAA batteries will provide ample power between solar/hand cranked charging.

#3. Manual Can Opener by Kitchen Aid
Rated Number One

When you're homebound, having the necessities within reach give you wiggle room from having to venture out or depend on someone to render aid for something as simple as a meal for you or your pet.
                       Open a Can!
While all of our modern appliances are electric or WIFI paired, during a crisis, you’re going to get hungry! Something as simple as a KitchenAid Classic Multifunction manual can/bottle opener keeps you self-sufficient during an emergency. 
It can also mean the difference between feeding your family, self or pet during a weather related/ rolling black/brownout grid down scenario. Opening a can of Pet milk, beans or dog food provides you operational contingency when others are scrambling for the basics.            
KitchenAid can opener features:
Stainless steel blade
Integrated bottle opener
Easy to turn knob
Ergonomic handle for comfort

Loving the Creature Inside
Part One
Finding Purpose in Illness

                        S”tick”ing it to You
Throughout decades of illness, I’ve ridden many tumultuous waves of despair. After being reinfected with Lyme disease thirteen years ago, I wasn’t prepared to have the worldly rug yanked out from under me. Used to bouncing back from whatever ailed me, I figured I was well equipped to prevail through any circumstance. Several months into a raging, mosquito born infection no one knew how to treat, I met my match. In the ring against a defiant bacterial organism, a formidable monster without bounds held me hostage.
Longing for my former life caused me significant pain. Once, I was extremely independent, worked hard, obtained advanced degrees, held jobs, business licenses and even ran my own small company. Stricken with Lyme forever changed my destiny. I quit looking back and waved the white flag of surrender. I wasn’t in control, a bitter pill to swallow back then.
Tossed about in a stormy sea of wicked syndromes including chronic fatigue, brain swelling and relapsing fevers, a volatile case of fully disseminating Burgdorferi Borrelia exited me from life as I knew it.
Not only does Burgdorferi Borrelia communicate with other arachnids inside the body through fiber optic speed inside the human host, but also shapeshift into cork shoe impenetrable organisms that can transform into completely self contained cysts rendering them impervious to anti-biotic treatment.
 Feeling hopeless, I researched as much as possible for immediate solutions. I was embarrassed to tell my friends and family my life had spun out of control. I was even more ashamed for my husband to witness my rapid decline. No longer a career-oriented bride, I was unable to bathe, cook or clean in the ruthless tete’ a tete’ with a bloodsucking arachnid.
Surprisingly, Lyme sufferers are discouraged to psychologically adopt a killing attitude when it comes to successfully eradicating the bacterial infection. I found this perspective somewhat counter-intuitive until coming across Dr. Stephen Buhner’s boof. Healing Lyme after months of failed triple antibiotic therapy. Under his tutelage, I took off the gloves and acknowledged all-Lyme’s all-consuming presence. It wouldn’t stand for being ignored. 
I, too, needed the friendship. I began asking it daily what it needed, invaluable insight gleaned from plant medicine specialist, Dr. Stephen Buhner in his powerful book, Healing Lyme. Sadly, he passed in December 2022. I owe him a debt of gratitude. His book changed my life. https://amzn.to/3qwKT75
Going to school and working full time, landing a job with upward mobility, securing a lofty mortgage for an unaffordable home, and taking out a vehicle loan involves dedicating most of one’s life to attending educational institutions and serving corporations until retirement or death, whichever comes first. 

 

Along the way, you’ll probably get married, have children while continuing to be enslaved to a monetary system which will hopefully be there for you should you fall ill and require medical and/or financial assistance. I marched on in the working world, propped up on chemicals, despite the lethal ramifications from the insect bite until an attack of catastrophic atrial fibrillation flushed out the murky waters of delusion. The workforce was no longer an option, and the government wasn’t coming to help. 
Suddenly, my creature was a life raft, providing me shelter from a merciless plight. I was humbled and thankful for my affliction as he ferried me away from the futile grind into the sea of my new destination.

De-stress and Bring Beauty and Calmness to Your Healing Space with Homedics Natural River Rock Table Fountain with Waterfall Sounds

 

                        In the Thicket of Things
Few in my sphere of existence understood life in the desert of uncertainty.  A concrete jungle castaway, I was stunned in a way to find people still measuring success and purpose by job title, yearly/hourly earnings, wealth in the form of amassed consumer and household goods, social class status, and one’s proximity to an “important” individual. It was shocking at first, a huge relief in hindsight. 

 

Sudden detachment from my former life severed a faulty connection to a misguided life. Maybe you’ve noticed others treating you differently, now that you’re forced to say no so much. Have others stopped inviting you places or quit calling? 
I challenge you to embrace the new you with better boundaries and self-care habits. It’s a good thing you don’t have all the time in the world anymore for unnecessary drama and pitfalls. 

 

Loss of Identity is One of the Major Psychological Issues Affecting Chronically Ill People. This Classic Masterpiece Can Help You Rediscover You're Passion.

Rustic Healing Emergency
Coconut Flour Chocolate Chip Cookies

Yields: 4 medium-large, soft cookies.

 

Ingredients:
I/3 cup plus 1 tbs. of coconut flour
1 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. + 1 pinch of fine grain sea salt (HEB generic is excellent)
1/3 cup coconut oil or high-quality butter, such as Kerry Gold
1 tsp. Vanilla (I prefer Watkins Baking Vanilla)
1/4 cup Maple syrup (make sure it’s 100% pure)
2 eggs
6 rectangular squares Baker’s Bittersweet chocolate chopped into pieces

 

Directions:
Preheat oven to 375 degrees
Line baking sheet with foil (optional/makes clean-up easier)
Melt coconut oil over medium heat
Combine dry ingredients in mixing bowl
Add eggs, vanilla, maple syrup and melted coconut oil and whisk until evenly distributed 
Stir chopped pieces of baker’s chocolate into wet mixture with spatula/wooden spoon.
Spoon dough into small chunks and flatten into desired thickness.
Bake for 9-12 minutes, or until chocolate sufficiently melts. Let cool and enjoy. 

 

the best coconut flour, by the way...

NOTE: If the consistency of the dough is too loose, add a pinch of coconut flour until the consistency is firm enough to shape into cookies. Feel free to chop the chocolate squares into smaller pieces. If you’re undergoing severe facial pain, have a family member or friend do the chopping, as certain physical activities can exacerbate the condition.

 

Also, I DO NOT recommend baking with chocolate chips as they do not adequately melt enough for those of us with facial pain. I’ve tried adding butterscotch and carob chips to no avail. 
Flatten out the cookie dough enough for you to easily eat later on. If they are still too difficult to enjoy, place cookie in a bowl and pour a cup of almond or regular milk over it to soften it even more!

Still Awake Late at Night? Delve into Your Favorite Novel with
Eye Caring 3 Temperature Lighting Book Light Featuring Stepless Dimming and Long Battery Life. Rechargeable Book Light Provides Cozy and Soft Lighting

Nationwide Grocery Delivery Services

Our Local Texas Grocery Store During the 2020 Winter Freeze

The 2020 national emergency turned our world upside down, especially when it comes to food shopping. As we enter Spring 2023, we’re facing supply chain shortages and sky rocketing inflation. Whether you’re going through illness or simply prepping and don’t feel safe going to the store, there are services we can rely on for food and grocery delivery. Check out these apps:

 

1. INSTACART: Delivers fresh food and household items, (even alcohol) the same day, sometimes within an hour of your order. I’ve used them for various items I forgot to pick up at the store. I prefer to have my goods left on the porch and not engage with anyone. I also notate the make and model of the vehicle. Keep your guard up always! Be sure to tip before checking out. http://www.instacart.com
2. SHIPT: This grocery delivery service offers first class shopping from well vetted employees who value the customer by staying in communication throughout the grocery shopping process. The staff undergo criminal background checks as well as video interviews. Sounds like you won’t have to worry about who’s delivering your food! http://shipt.com
3. FAVOR: The Favor app. This Texas business offers express delivery to your home or workplace from any grocery store, restaurant or drugstore. Headquartered out of San Antonio, Texas, they promise fast, expeditious. customer service in under an hour for some deliveries. NOTE: I’m only seeing one star for customer satisfaction so beware. http://www.favordelivery.com
4. Door Dash: http://doordash.com
5. UberEats: Founded in 2011, this food delivery service was acquired by Uber in 2020. http://www.ubereats.com

KardiaMobile Personal EKG Monitor Saved Me Unnecessary Trips to The ER after Experiencing Atrial Fibrillation from Lyme Disease

How to Use KardiaMobile Video

After being infected with neuro-Lyme disease, I began experiencing strange cardiac symptoms. Having exhausted my finances, I also lost my health insurance. Trips to the emergency room left me without any solutions or diagnosis. I knew by the painful, sudden onset of chest pressure, arm pain and high heart rate that something was going on.

It wasn’t until I dropped from a spell of catastrophic atrial fibrillation that required cardioversion to reverse that I had a mammoth road to recovery ahead of me. My cardiologist suggested I purchase a KardiaMobile personal EKG monitor to keep track of daily cardiac activity. The app provides checklists of symptoms and activity, including emotional state, prior to taking a reading. This device has saved me thousands of dollars in emergency care by allowing me to see if and when I’m in a life-threatening condition. 

Can Clove Oil Prevent Lyme Disease?

Lyme disease is a serious, potentially life-threatening, bacterial infection. In this poster, the erythema migrans (rash on arm) is the entry point for the shape-shifting bergdorferi spirochete. These deep tissue dwellers feed on the body's collagen.
The answer is YES! I believe clove oil can prevent Lyme if you take the necessary, time sensitive steps within the first few minutes of the initial bite. https://healthwatchlist.com/
Had I properly treated the circular, red welt on the back of my leg after the mosquito bite, https://aldf.com/can-lyme-disease-be-transmitted-to-humans-by-mosquitoes-horse-flies-and-deer-flies-2/ I might have avoided twelve plus years and counting of catastrophic illness. While hindsight is 20/20, I should have done the following: 
1. Ice the area of the mosquito/tick bite for several minutes. Time is of the essence and stopping the spreading of inflammation is key.
2. Dry off the area and liberally apply clove essential oil by NOW directly to the bite. https://amzn.to/3CaWLhV Lightly rub in several layers every hour. I keep Now Clove Essential Oil on hand for this purpose. I also clean with it.
3. Monitor how you’re feeling. Don’t be afraid to visit your local minor emergency if you can’t get in right away to see your regular doctor. If the bite has you concerned, let a medical professional know you’re concerned about becoming ill with a vector bone illness. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28291638
4. Monitor your bug bite. Most mosquito and tick bites aren’t lethal, but don’t underestimate their potency. If a bite is red, inflamed and appears unusual in size or shape, please seek medical attention. Do everything you can in the natural to reduce swelling. 
The Mayo Clinic suggests the following procedure regarding tick bites: https://www.mayoclinic.org/first-aid/first-aid-tick-bites/basics/art-20056671
COMPREHENSIVE TESTING AVAILABLE FROM IGENEX

https://igenex.com/

 
 

"Clove oil could have prevented my bug bite from nearly killing me..."

Rose Bergamot Essential Oil by Eden's Garden Lifts Depressed Mood, Relieves Anxiety and Promotes Feelings of Peace
It's My Favorite Mood Booster!

A synergy blend of rose, bergamot and patchouli, rose bergamot essential oil lifts depression and revitalizes mood.
When my spirit is low, I dab several drops of rose bergamot essential oil on my writsts, decollate', and behind my ears. It dispels whatever down mood I'm in instantly. A beautiful, natural scent is powerful medicine.

Flower Power Directions

Add 2-5 drops bergamot to body wash, shampoo or facial scrub.
Add 1/2 drop bergamot oil to unscented candle. 
Dab on pillow, sheets, comforter, bandanna or scarf for a soothing scent at home!

 

Prepare for an Emergency Aromatherapy Experience

Store soy free tea light candles in tin cans and glass jars for immediate use during a power outage.  
When the lights go out, you’ll be ready to read, relax while staying in control of your surroundings! 

Simple, Non-Toxic D.I.Y. Homemade Candles from an Expert

Avoid the toxic fumes from petroleum based scented candles by using clean, chemical free ingredients and pure, essential oils. Taking control of your health begins with making simple changes as part of a healing lifestyle. 

Feel better fast and beautifully with an aromatherapy necklace!

Living with Chronic Illness (Lyme) Through a Societal Collapse
Part One

                      Waking Up to a Fallen World
According to the latest statistics, 68% of Americans are living paycheck to paycheck. Once considered the land of milk and honey, mass murder, out of control border crossings, bank failures and mass government corruption have soured the cream. As our dollar crashes, mass train derailments, toxic forever chemical spills and numerous food processing plant fires paint a bleak picture of a fallen world. 
In the trenches of societal collapse, many of us find ourselves co-existing with some type of a chronic illness with just in time provisions, completely dependent on tenuous infrastructure. Yet to be hardened due to lack of funding, our power grid is under constant threat of sabotage. According to sources, an EMP could devastate our modern way of life forever. 
The potential for something cataclysmic looming over the horizon makes now the time to laser-focus on improving your health and personal safety by securing energy, food and water. Depending on your degree of debilitation, planning for an emergency may pose the toughest challenge you’ve ever faced. Don’t give up. There are simple ways to provide yourself with contingency of operation plans from the comfort of home. https://www.ready.gov/plan
 
Even though we were miles away from Hurricane Harvey's landfall, We could hear the angry roar of the storm and feel the ground vibrate.
                         Climatize Your Digs

 

Deep in south Texas, the suffocating heat poses life-threatening health hazards without proper intervention. After Hurricane Harvey, we were left without electricity for a short time. Besides having a few gallons of water, we weren’t prepared to safely ride out the suffocating humidity. In the wake of horrific destruction, the storm thankfully left us unscathed. 
Looting predictably started within hours of the storm’s passing. I vowed to make several life-changing decisions after an armed robbery occurred less than a half-mile away at the break of dawn. Overwhelmed with fear, I held the fort down alone while my husband scouted the damage, forced to leave most of the windows open for relief. Armed and ready, I stood guard.

 

The first measure I took was to invest in a lithium battery solar generator to power a small window AC unit to cool the bedroom. After extensive research, I chose the Bluetti Portable Power Station AC200P, 2000 Wh Battery Backup Solar Generator. which can power up to 99% of my home appliances, including my Frigidaire AC window unit. This decision has been a game changer for me. https://amzn.to/440WuL0
My Bluetti solar power charger stays charged and ready to run my AC window unit, laptop and table lamp in an emergency. This summer in Texas, we're being urged to prepare for rolling blackouts as our state welcomes 30,000 new residents from out of state everyday. Our grid is not hardened enough to supply this amount of population growth.
Less fearful of inhospitable conditions from rolling Texas summer blackouts or being alone when the lights go out in the middle of the night, a generator provides the comfort of knowing my pets will comfortably fare through the unforgiving Texas heat alongside me during a crisis. I can plug in a small refrigerator or alternate between the window unit AC and standard fridge, recharge my phone and laptop or power the UV light on my Evo Pure Water filtration system. https://www.evowatersystems.com/product/whole-house-water-filter/?oid=1&affid=23
What are your electrical priorities? How drastic are the weather changes in your area? Which is hardest on your physicality, the heat or the cold? Is the heat bearable enough only to be concerned with wintertime? Make a list of your greatest concerns if a national emergency were to sever you from goods and services. Do you suffer from extreme anxiety and/or PTSD? A power station can prevent you from going to a crowded cooling center or shelter.
Another positive aspect of running a solar generator is the advantage of being stealth. No noisy engine to attract unwanted attention from the neighbors. In my neighborhood I’m already on guard. Many once, thriving middle-class rental homes are abandoned or falling quickly into ruin. I often wonder what happened to the landlord. At this point, none of us can afford to unnecessarily expose ourselves to the pervasive criminal element. https://www.safehome.org/resources/crime-statistics-by-state
 If you have any question about how much solar to order, which power bank is best for you or how to connect MC4 cables from your solar panels to your Bluetti, you can call them anytime. I’ve spoken with the owner on several occasions, and he is friendly, very professional, courteous plus he really cares about providing you with life-saving energy. http://www.bluettipower.com

                        Chronic-Illness Contingency Ops
Contending with chronic-Lyme symptoms such as debilitating chronic fatigue syndrome and bradycardia sometimes prevent me from living a normal, productive life. Some days, getting out of bed, dressing, preparing meals and cleaning are nearly impossible. When the power suddenly goes out, shock, panic and worry will instantaneously exacerbate any health condition. https://www.fema.gov/pdf/library/pfd.pdf A solar power generator can help you adapt to drastic, sudden changes in circumstance, especially if you’re enduring prolonged periods of convalescence.
Be honest with yourself about what you’re capable of achieving without electrical power. Do you need a nebulizer, CPAP machine or refrigeration for medication, food preservation, baby formula or a bottle of cold water? With a solar generator, you can utilize power for all of the above. If you don’t have room for solar panels, you can fully charge the Bluetti AC200p in 2 1/2 hours with included car charge cable. You don’t have to purchase solar panels right away. The Bluetti Ac200P is reasonably priced for use as a stand-alone generator. https://amzn.to/3NnkDFE 
While bugging out is all the rage, the reality is most of us are looking at sheltering-in for the long-run. In a weather-related emergency such as a hurricane, we typically have a few days to contemplate contingency plans. Fast moving squall lines and sudden severe weather is often unpredictable. A fully charged solar generator from Bluetti offers a smooth transition back to normalcy during a grid down catastrophe. https://amzn.to/3NnkDFE
Without proper indoor climate control, your exposure to disease carrying insects increases exponentially. Find a generator that can handle extreme heat or cold weather.
The next step to climatizing my room was acquiring a window unit with remote control and internal temperature sensor. Needing one that could efficiently cool at least 500 square feet, I chose a Frigidaire 8000 BTU portable air conditioner. https://amzn.to/41IJOHe I like this model’s settings, easy to clean filter and sleep timer. I installed it myself (get someone to help you just in case) in the bedroom window.
I arranged 4 100W solar panels on top of wooden plats at 15-20 degrees off the ground, predominantly facing west. https://news.energysage.com/solar-panel-performance-orientation-angle During the heat of an August afternoon, I can comfortably run my Frigidaire AC on the Bluetti without substantial power loss for several hours. I discovered it pulls the most energy when the compressor surges, other than that, in full sunlight, this generator charges rapidly. https://www.techradar.com/reviews/bluetti-ac200p-ac-power-generator
  
My Bluetti and Frigidaire go together like peanut butter and jelly. I can’t imagine life without either one. Look into the means of having not only a back-up power station, but the means of controlling your household climate. Design a quick and easy set-up. Practice now to work out the kinks.
When you’re wiped out from illness, having a simple set-up can be the difference between sheltering from home or being dependent on someone or someplace you don’t know or like. In today’s polarized world, we can’t always count on family or friends to come through for us during a health crisis. The last thing we need to worry about is subjecting ourselves to abusive people or strangers during an emergency, Nowadays, our fellow man is likely to hate us for religious or political beliefs. Start thinking off-grid in all ways.
                        “Nothing That Bad Could Ever Happen”
After the Texas winter storm in 2021, I was still behind the curve. Not having paid close attention to the oncoming polar vortex barreling towards us, I awoke in the middle of the night to the unmistakable pop of a power outage. I looked outside to discover the vegetation, streets and eaves shimmering with freezing rain and climbed back in bed. 
I turned on my NOAA weather radio under the covers. To my shock, Texas was in the arctic jowls of a killer winter storm. Reports of a state-wide grid failure dominated the air waves. Inaccessibility to water due to frozen pipes plus no electricity for heating left The Lone Star state frozen in her tracks. Close to 700 souls would freeze to death. https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/peteraldhous/texas-winter-storm-power-outage-death-toll
Widespread, critical infrastructure failed on a Katrina-like scale. Unlike anything we’ve experienced in recent Texas history, flooding from busted pipes froze into eerie indoor ice sculptures. Fires and killer CO gas proved deadly in apartment and residential dwellings. Many people were forced to endure these conditions as roads and highways were closed. 
Many Texans were forced to stand in line for hours in sub-freezing temperatures for food, water and other basic necessities. Some residents burned furniture in the fireplace to keep warm. 
Millions more without power. The brutal reality was a tough pill to swallow for everyone involved, especially the startling revelation that our power grid on the whole was moments from complete, irreversible failure. 
We were fortunate to have running water throughout the week-long disaster. Thankfully, our plumbing had recently been upgraded and replaced with pipes designed to expand under extreme temperatures. Our gas stovetop operational, we heated up canned beans and made hot cocoa. Keeping the kitchen warm by running the gas stove could have been a deadly decision due to CO’s undetectable, odorless CO (carbon monoxide) fumes, key survival insight I gained from living through countless winter storms on a north Texas farm.

 

I lit several large candles and placed them strategically in the bathroom and bedroom in hope to take out the chill in the air. While the one in the bathroom helped, the air was simply too cold. Our lungs and bones were painfully sore from days of breathing arctic air. We couldn’t get warm enough. Both my husband and I huddled in heavy winter gear under layers of blankets and comforters I’ve collected throughout our marriage. Preserving over two decades of bedding served invaluable. 

When the Grid and Internet are Down...

                               NOTE:
Our NOAA Voyager weather radio provided us with life-saving information during the deadly Texas winter storm in 2021 while the grid was down. We turned to it for hourly weather updates and entertainment at night, listening to interesting radio shows over the AM and short-wave frequencies. We would have never known the degree of the catastrophic weather unfolding around us in the Lone Star state as the internet was down.

 

 

During hurricane season and severe storms, the emergency alert feature sounds an alarm notifying you of tornado warnings as soon as they’re issued. When the WIFI is out, you’ll need a means to obtain critical, life-saving news and information. 

 

Highways, interstates, county roads and residential streets statewide were closed or impassable. In our neighborhood, uninformed residents attempted to drive on the frozen concrete, only to spin out of control into a nearby ditch. No one was going anywhere, especially on foot. 

 

After a break in the clouds, a blast of above freezing, sunny skies melted the sidewalks enough for us to walk our dogs. The warmth from the sun was heaven on earth. I never imagined I would be so grateful for the fireball that during the summer months, hellishly tortures the south. Approaching a familiar neighborhood, we heard large-scale purring of fuel generator engines powering multiple homes. A sense of dread overcame us as we realized how unprepared we were in the grip of a killer freeze. A dark and cold home awaited our return, 
Shortly afterward, my father gifted us with a Northern Tool gas generator. I keep fuel stored in high-grade five-gallon waterproof, plastic containers. We could have plugged-in the space heater collecting dust in the corner. I used to say, “it could never get that cold”, or “nothing that bad could ever happen here.” 
                       Final Thoughts
My hope for everyone reading is to start thinking about how to prepare for success in the face of chronic illness, such as Lyme or CFS in the aftermath of foul weather, national emergency, grid failure, and/or loss of utilities due to job loss.

 

Before educating myself on how to live off-grid in a SHTF scenario, I worried how my family, pets and I would make it during a crisis, especially if the power grid was compromised. http://states.aarp.org/are-you-prepared-for-an-emergency Investing in solar and gas-powered generators, storing water and food alleviated 95% of my concerns. The action you take in preparing for disaster reduces unnecessary worry and anguish. In the theatre of chronic illness, we can surmount un-foreseen obstacles one well-informed decision at a time.

 

With enough planning, preparation and the right tools, we can transition from barely surviving to thriving.

Living With a Chronic Illness (Lyme) Through a Societal Collapse
Part II

             While the Dust Settles
Several days ago, the Department of Homeland Security issued a dire warning in the United States to prepare for “the potential for violence in the lead-up to the 2024 election cycle that could target the nation’s critical infrastructure, faith-based institutions, government facilities and minority communities…” https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/dhs-warns-attacks-government-buildings-minority-groups-ahead-2024-elec-rcna86067  
As of May 2023, there have been 240 mass shootings, leaving 300 souls dead and 900 injured. In the latest massacre at an Alvin, Texas outlet store, eight people were killed, leaving 7 others injured. One glance at our Texas southern border should clarify any uncertainty about the world devolving into total chaos. Incredibly, higher incidences of violence are being linked to climate change. According to Futurity, the hotter it gets, the more violent people become. https://www.futurity.org/climate-change-violence-2701922-2/ 
Whether you’re a believer or not, it’s safe to say the earth and its inhabitants are undergoing dangerous, historically violent change on the global stage. While there’s not much we can do about any of it, especially if we’re contending with a chronic illness, we can enhance our own personal security by stocking up on shelf-stable foods to keep us out of the crowds while the dust may or may not settle. It’s time to take our power back by taking solution-based action.
                    Quel est le Probleme?
Many of American’s are polarized over gun control. Many blame the gun, not the shooter. In America, the conversation centers around abolishing the second amendment to the U.S. Constitution. Young people everywhere are addicted to computer games stimulating and providing adrenaline rushes through committing gross acts of heinous violence, including torture, rape, murder and hatred for the rule of law. 
Games such as Tormentor 2024 glorify gore and depravity, fracturing young minds with reprobate enmity. rewiring their internal circuitry through spells cast through the L.E.D. turning them into unrepentant zombie-like evildoers. We’re living in perhaps one of the most violent generations known to man.
If you dare take a peek into the new generation of soul destroying “video games’, you’ll be astonished at the level of brutality young and middle aged participants willingly suspend their disbelief in the name of entertainment.
I’m showing you this to hopefully educate you, dear readers, about the mind state of a large, rapidly growing portion of the population we’re forced to co-exist with unknowingly at times whenever we go anywhere. One of the main ways to protect yourself against any violent crime or attack is to know your enemy. With this basic fundamental, you now have justification for being as self-sufficient and prepared as possible. 
Whenever I go to the grocery store, I run into young people wearing merchandise from shows such as The Walking Dead and Breaking Bad along with grisly tattoos depicting skulls and beasts. These are sick shows glorifying and justifying acts of unspeakable violence in the name of self-preservation and greed, not to mention complete disregard for law enforcement. Wholesomeness and purity are a thing of the past.
Along with the ruthless stampede of foreigners destroying many Texas cities flooding the southern border seeking asylum and God only knows what else, we’re living during a continuous, hostile and desperate invasion. Our leaders have demonstrated impotence and delusion over this and many other critical issues posing direct threats to our freedom and national security, We’re not in Kansas anymore. (From The Wizard of Oz”)
                      Machinating Intercessors
I have nothing against gamers. I understand there are many making a legitimate living around the world on gaming sites. However, we are living in a world where several generations have been raised, babysat, educated and entertained via a computer interface. The natural process of finding a mate has been circumvented by dating site apps and dangerous online platforms. People are willfully exposing themselves to predators on an unfathomable rate, and not surviving.   https://www.brickdonlaw.com/blog/2021/january/what-are-the-dangers-of-online-dating-/
Well into the fourth industrial revolution, humanity is quickly losing its connection to nature, farming, trades and important social interaction. In the United States, credit card and personal debt is at an all-time high as middle and upper-middle class individuals are living paycheck to paycheck. Very few, if any, are prepared to ride out a personal, manmade or weather disaster. Many have less than one thousand dollars in savings.  https://www.npr.org/2020/12/16/941292021/paycheck-to-paycheck-nation-how-life-in-america-adds-up
As I approach yet another hearing as my offender comes up soon for parole, I’m reminded that the world has been inherently violent since the beginning. Nothing new is under the sun for God, but for us we’re living in unchartered territory. Looking back, I wish I’d had the foresight not to have ventured out late at night into the concrete Serengeti, also known as the watering hole. https://www.nsc.org/road/safety-topics/distracted-driving/parking-lot-safety

 

The man who abducted me so far has shown no remorse, regret or given any apology for his actions. His report as a prisoner is grim and his behavior deplorable as he has made zero attempt to improve himself in any way, shape or form. If he is released after my official protest, all I can do is warn you that a homicidal maniac in on the loose. I no longer believe violent offenders can be rehabilitated.   https://bjs.ojp.gov/topics/recidivism-and-reentry

 

In today’s world, stocking up on the basics can mean the difference between unnecessarily standing in long lines during an emergency, or staying home when it’s late at night and you find yourself alone, hungry and too debilitated to go to the supermarket. From experience, I encourage you no matter what condition you’re in to start putting back shelf stable goods for immediate and future use. While God has the whole world in His hands, corrupt systems don’t. In the wake of a global food crisis, our local grocery store shelves are spotty. No one is speaking about this on any news outlet here in the United States.   https://www.wfp.org/emergencies/global-food-crisis

My Favorite Top Five Shelf Stable Foods

A Pall of Darkness Flooded My Sky;
Living with Lyme and Major Depression

I took a painting class several years into my reinfection with Lyme in 2011. This portrait of me was painted by a well-known local artist whose name I've forgotten. Other artists noted my expression was sad and heavy. I was astonished at how accurate they were! My heart still yearns to wander the fields of barley.
                  Melancholic Autumn Dusk
I was raised on a sprawling ranch on the rolling plains of a north Texas ranch until my dad was forced to sell it in the mid 1990’s. We grew barley, alfalfa and coastal Bermuda for livestock and horses. I freely wandered the spectacular thousand-acre wonderland of ephemeral creeks, ponds and an Artesian spring fed lake with my two Labrador retrievers, Katy and Lola. 

 

While I lost myself in the beauty and intrigue of nature and her fury of spring and winter storms, nothing could prepare me for the virulence of the tick born illness lurking in the pastures known as Lyme disease. I plucked many, fully engorged Ixodes scapularis, also known as deer ticks, off my dogs on a regular basis with my bare hands. I also removed attached medium-sized deer ticks from the hairline behind my ear. On occasion, I’d discover one embedded in my scalp. 

 

I also missed months of school due to mysterious illnesses no doctor could adequately diagnose, many which were antibiotic resistant. A thick, penetrating fog combined with neck and cranial swelling accompanied severe depression. Geographic isolation combined with chronic, unresolved infections took a heavy toll on my mental and physical health. 
A common theme of deep sadness and hopelessness came through in my writing and artwork at school. I wrote it off partly to being a creative type, but instinctively I knew something was wrong. Isolated out in the countryside, I attributed it partially to losing my adopted mother at an early age to alcoholism, in combination with the volatile arguments between my stepmother and father. Maintaining a ranch was costly in more ways than one, and disagreements over money surfaced frequently. 

Often, I was unusually exhausted after physical activity. By the beginning of my senior year in high school, I began a strict diet with my family’s approval, aside from the fact I wasn’t overweight. My teachers, all of whom I cherished, began commenting on how gaunt I appeared. While consistently on the A honor roll, I was accepted to a private college on the east coast. I wasn’t ready for relocating cross country, especially not having any connections, friends or family up there. 

Doterra's oregano essential oil cleared my asthma for good.

During my last Lyme infection, my asthma worsened due to a Babesia coinfection. After applying several generous drops of oregano oil (specifically Doterra, it's worth the investment) on the bottom of both feet for several months at night before bed, it went away for good. I no longer need my inhaler, although I keep one around for emergencies.

Dr. Walter Reed circa 1900 proved yellow fever was carried by mosquitoes. It's frightening how far the medical community has strayed from life-saving vector born disease detection.
Youth, resolve and ambition combined with the Lord’s strength propelled me forward. Plagued by chronic fatigue, persistent swollen tonsils (chronic tonsilitis and strep), enlarged lymph nodes under my arms and on my scalp, severe depression, abnormally heavy and painful menses, extreme anxiety, insomnia, obsessive-compulsive behavior, intolerance to alcohol, worsening eating disorder, asthma, tendency to self-harm, unresolved, relapsing fevers, flu-like symptoms and chronic mononucleosis, I had no inkling I was battling Lyme disease and multiple co-infections.  

For a comprehensive guide to Lyme disease symptoms and coinfections, please visit CanLyme at https://canlyme.com/  

 
Note: Yellow Fever, a mosquito bone disease, killed around 100.00 – 150,000 people over a twenty-five year period. If you live in a mosquito endemic area, be sure to stay covered and attend to bug bites immediately. I was infected with Lyme in Texas by a mosquito. No one in the medical community would admit this vector route was possible. The extensive testing through IGENEX proved everyone wrong. 
It’s astounding that the medical community has forgotten the staggering population reduction from yellow fever. Humanity has a short memory. Originating in 1793 in Philadelphia, it wasn’t until 1900 when Dr. Walter Reed discovered yellow fever was carried by mosquitoes. The symptoms included sudden onset of fever and chills, severe headache, back pain, general body aches, nausea and vomiting, fatigue and weakness to name a few. https://www.cdc.gov/yellowfever/symptoms/index.html
 Yellow Fever is still active in Africa and South America

mosquitos carry Lyme...

Many people diagnosed with Lyme don't recall a bite.
                 A Lack of Comprehensive Testing and Medical Care can Destroy Your Life
Around the month of April 1986, I wrote my senior year thesis on the different types of loneliness. I still have the paper and it’s a painful read. When graduation day came, I was at the lowest point of my life. My stepmother was eager to ship me cross country to school. Doing my best to keep the peace, I kept a lid on my fragile mental and physical condition. In retrospect, I was doing a terrible job. Anorectic, depressed and chronically ill, I had no business leaving town.

 

 One night I overheard her on the phone complaining to a friend that she hadn’t signed on to playing nursemaid to her husband’s daughter…me. Overcome with immense guilt and shame, I wanted to die. 
In all fairness, she drove me into town over the years multiple times for doctor’s visits in order to obtain a diagnosis for the persistent maladies. It never occurred to me to mention to any physician the copious amount of tick exposure (bites and handling, and embedded ones, some I brought home from Colorado after summer camp). No doctor ever inquired or tested me for anything vector born. 
Ultimately, I was referred back to my childhood pediatrician, Dr. Hawkins. After running more bloodwork, he diagnosed me with blood poisoning. After a course of steroids, the symptoms temporarily abated. 
 

Burgdorferi Borrelia can be malarial, a key discovery in Stephen Buhner's compelling book, Healing Lyme

Healing Lyme by Stephen Harrod Buhner is a must read if you're suffering with Lyme, coinfections or post Lyme infection syndrome.
               Southern Girl Interrupted
Away at college, I took a full course load, attended classes regularly, made decent grades, slept often and stayed up all night with my roommate from a suburb in New York. We got along famously, but she was battling her own demons. During Christmas break, she attempted to take her own life over an abusive boyfriend who was attending business school in nearby Pennsylvania. I had no idea she was suffering so badly.
We weren’t as close as I thought and after freshman year, I chose to get my own dorm room. 
During this period in the late 1980’s, the HIV outbreak was claiming countless lives. The topic captivated me, as I was experiencing many similar symptoms. Terrified I might have somehow contracted it from a dirty toilet seat or by kissing someone, (baseless rumors inciting fear) I underwent several blood tests. I knew it was a long shot, but I needed answers. Thankfully, they were all negative. 
Other students on campus, including my roommate, were incredibly career driven. Many had already declared a major while I was still on the fence. I had zero idea of what I wanted to do with my life. I knew I was good at writing and received lots of praise from my teachers. I wrote a lot of poetry, short stories and became an on campus writing tutor. However, lurking beneath the terra firma, my body was calling the shots.  https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/how-healing-works/202204/when-your-body-makes-the-rules-living-chronic-condition
I couldn't wait to get back to the atmospheric masterpieces aloft the Texas skies.
In the late 1980’s, I transferred to a Texas college. I didn’t fit in up yonder! I was surprised by the disappointment my writing professors displayed over losing their “star writer”. I wish I’d had the confidence back then to trust in my talents, abilities and dedicated instructors.
While my health seemed to improve during the spring, I couldn’t shake the depression and debilitating fatigue. There were other girls just like me in the dorm, but mostly they kept to themselves. The full-length mirror in the hallway brought out the worst in us.  We all thought we were fat and ugly! 

 

I returned home a wreck in many ways. My parents were heavy drinkers, and my system was becoming increasingly chemically sensitive. (I still have an allergy to alcohol, cleaners and many pharmaceuticals.) They also exhibited the behavioral “isms” that go along with alcoholism, prompting me to continue to bottle up all of the physical and mental suffering I was experiencing. I had to be perfect and maintain a certain image when I was struggling. Short reprieves came and went without any resolution.
by October of 1988, my health had deteriorated to the point of hospitalization. After several weeks, I underwent a full medical and psychological workup only to be diagnosed with major depression and a possible viral infection and was placed on multiple prescription anti-depressant medications. I felt like a zombie. 
A woman several rooms down from mine lumbered through the hallway like the Bride of Frankenstein after her daily rounds of electro-shock therapy. Whoever she once was…was gone. The vacancy in her eyes and soulless presence mortified me. I couldn’t believe my life was this derailed. I was performing well academically but didn’t have it in me to complete the semester.  I also managed to work part-time while attending school. My body shut down.
At this point, I felt like everything was my fault. I recalled being sick a lot as a young girl. I’m certain I was born with Burgdorferi Borrelia. I believe my birth mother was infected with it and passed it on to me in vitro. I was born premature. She gave me up at six weeks. I have so much gratitude for her! The home I was adopted from located her at my request. I wanted badly to find my mom.  She didn’t want any contact. I’m ok with that, now. I’ve made peace with my past.  https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/mothers-may-pass-lyme-disease-to-children-in-the-womb/
                             Beware the Sinister Man
Several months after returning home, I quit taking the medication. The situation on the ranch was becoming increasingly hostile and unsustainable for any meaningful, lasting happiness. I found a job in retail, moved out and started my life over. Soon, my best friend and I were sharing an apartment and going to the local college together. 
I came to accept that depression was something I would have to live with. Medication wasn’t working and I hated the side effects. In spite of everything going well, I felt something terrible was on the horizon. 
Something about the razor sharp, geometric rays of sunlight casting elongated stark shadows around the waning sunlight stirred the pronounced uncertainty dwelling inside me. Papery reddened and orange leaves caught in vortices of gusting, north wind ushering in the first cold front announced the death nail of summer and something else inexplicable.

 

Late one afternoon on my day off, Jessica and I decided to go out to lunch on the town square. I recall having felt poorly, like I was moving through a thick substance. I was in the way of a woman, and my immune system was predictably compromised. I kept telling myself we should have ordered in. The still, small voice we all have was screaming like a petulant child and like many of us, I ignored it.
A powerful cold front was battering north Texas with gale force wind and a freezing, sudden drop in temperature. Over the radio, the wind chill was forecasted to dip into the thirties. The phone rang as soon as we returned home. A friend of mine insisted I go to her house to discuss the logistics of shooting a music video for her band. She was the lead singer and had the coolest hair and clothes. I was young and impressionable.
At the time, I was taking a film class and had an old, super 8 home video camera I was using to shoot random footage for an independent movie…a big dream of mine. We got together and worked on some ideas for a future shoot. I couldn’t believe it. My first gig! Little did I know that night would nearly be my last.

I stopped at the local supermarket on the way home. Strolling through the parking lot towards the main entrance, I noticed a slovenly, inebriated male in his twenties sitting inside a banged-up vehicle with the windows down. Striking me immediately as odd due to the frigid weather, his eyes locked onto me. Amidst unseasonable thunder, a painful chill coursed through my spine like lightening. 
I picked up a few unnecessary items and checked out. I dreaded going back to my car. The glass, automatic doors parted, sending a tsunami of October air inside the store. Reluctantly, I walked through the parking lot. He was still there. I pretended not to notice. Once I was safely back inside my vehicle, I backed out and headed home. I noticed the time was 11p.m. Exiting the parking lot, I was blinded by glaring headlights, much like Janet Lee in Psycho. 
Hardly anyone was out. In fact, the usual route I drove home was desolate. I adjusted the rearview mirror to deflect the binding glare. My heart pounded. He was riding my bumper.
I jumped the curb to the apartment parking lot and pulled into a space. When he followed suit, I knew I was in for it. I waited inside my two-door sedan beneath the moonless canopy of night, praying he would go away. He blocked me in perpendicularly with his car, exited and disappeared behind the two-story building. I knew Jessica was alone. I wish I could have called her. When he was out of sight, I exited my car.

 

In a matter of seconds, he appeared. Standing ten feet away, I noticed his air was amber beneath the streetlight. I said, “You’re going to kill me, aren’t you,” I stated more than asked.

 

He ambushed me, forced me at knifepoint back inside my vehicle and abducted me. Driving like a madman, I tried to jump out of the car. Grabbing me by the hair, I realized escaping wasn’t a viable option. The stress and fright were enough to kill someone. Looking back, I thank God for the difficult people and tough situations I endured. Survival substance.

 

I needed every drop of it to survive. I discovered immediately the futility of bargaining for my life. After undergoing the inevitable, I managed to de-escalate the situation. In a future post, I’ll discuss how I survived and outline methods of self-protection to prevent being one from being captured in the first place. At the time, I possessed zero self-defense skills.
By the grace of God, he let me go in a rural area where I ran barefooted to an isolated home where, thankfully, I was able to summon help.  Needless to say, I terrified the homeowners who were recently burgled of their firearms. This event marked the beginning of a new era in my life. The veil was lifted, so to speak, and I lived to tell. 
Did I mention an old friend from high school, Paul, called me the week before the crime, insistent on meeting with me? While the call struck me as odd, he was adamant about us having “an important conversation”. One of my favorite people in school, Paul was a talented musician and singer who played Christian hymnals on the piano. On the scheduled evening, he picked me up in his VW bug to escort me to an event. Driving on the outskirts of town, he fervently witnessed to me. At first, I was frightened.
Driving down the dark highway, he commanded me to give my life to Jesus Christ, fearful my eternal life was in jeopardy. I accepted. Paul’s bold conviction compelled me. I felt the Holy Spirit move through me inside the tiny, yellow VW bug. I could have never imagined what was waiting for me a week later. We never know what life has in store for us. How could Paul have known? The still, small voice may have been screaming inside of him. The world is a supernatural place.
The switchblade never prospered.
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Shock plates on the side of the stun gun will shock the attacker if they try to take the gun from you!
Had I been carrying a stun gun or had one in my glove box or under the seat easily in reach, I would have stood a chance at not being abducted. 
Delivering painful stopping power, Vipertek VTS-989-1 Billion Heavy Stun Gun with rechargeable flashlight has a lifetime guarantee. Ultra sharp spike electrodes penetrate heavy clothing, stopping a perpetrator in his/her tracks. This model is heavy and contoured to fit securely in your hand. 
                        Lady Justice Prevailed

 

My offender was captured within seventy-two hours of the attack. A trial ensued the following spring and the jury threw the book at him. While my personal life, including mental health and personal struggles were exposed to society throughout the courtroom drama and newspapers, lady justice and a great jury came through for me. 

 

I finished spring semester of college and moved to another city under the advice of our local district attorney. At the time, I was completely unaware of the crippling case of PTSD that would take me decades to conquer. 
Over many years, I underwent counseling and cognitive behavioral therapy to address the myriad of physical and emotional toll of the heinous crime, along with an undetected virus I contracted from the perpetrator. Violence, in my opinion, is a disease. 
I started over again in a new city, finished my degree, worked and ploughed through life. Experiencing short spans of symptoms remissions, I had an entirely different battle ahead. Aside from the PTSD, my female reproductive health deteriorated on an unimaginable level, compounding everything else. Unable to hold a job for long, I was struggling to survive. I managed to undergo therapy when I could, until my victim’s compensation was denied. 
"Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising up every time we fail." Ralph Waldo Emerson.
Back home, my family unit dissolved, and the ranch was sold. No one was handling things with any sobriety or maturity. Devastated, I kept marching forward. I knew God was with me. While my family considered me a failure, in another few years, I would meet my soon to be husband. By the way, none of my friends or co-workers treated me like one. 

 

During the stressful years comprising my twenties, I obtained a college degree, worked in my desired field of study and lived in modest apartments before making the decision to relocate one last time to be with my future husband. Driving away in a loaded U-Haul truck with my Giant Schnauzer, Major, I was relieved by the diminishing reflection of a beastly city undergoing a nightmarish population explosion dwindle in the driver’s side mirror.  
In ten years, I would get re-infected once again with fully disseminated neuro-Lyme disease from a mosquito. Unarmed without proper self-care knowledge, I was re-victimized by the system, this time being officially denied my social security disability. 
Expect the unexpected, never let your guard down, listen to your body/gut/intuition, protect yourself, research what ails you and find what works for you in terms of taking exquisite care of yourself. No one can effectively do this for you. Turn your will over to the Lord and buckle up. This planet is a rough ride with beautiful scenery and quite a few angels awaiting entertainment.
 
Expect to be a work in progress when dealing with a chronic illness and depression.
                      Miracles of Protecting Yourself
A work in progress, I’m still testing highly positive for Lyme. I’ve been able through diet (mainly Keto), daily walks, gentle detoxification and vitamin/mineral/collage supplementation to lessen the virulence. Establishing healthy boundaries, doing your own research and arming yourself with knowledge alone are critical infrastructural for paving the way for the miracles of protecting yourself. 
I believe unresolved trauma should be considered a key factor in successfully treating chronic illness, as the improvement of one’s overall quality of life must be taken into consideration. I chose to focus on things that make me happy (writing/creativity), spend time in nature and stay close to the Lord. Practicing self-compassion while maintaining healthy boundaries is essential for healing. Leaning to say “no” when you “can’t” is a huge step towards recovery.  
Do your own research. Gain control over your life by taking your power back from the system. When it comes to Lyme disease, no one has yet to discover the adequate time frame for successful antibiotic treatment. You must be diligent in everything you do to protect yourself from any community who claims to be able to cure this maniacal infection. https://www.lymedisease.org/
Keeping a gratitude journal has been lifechanging for me. I hope you find gratitude on your healing journey!

Keeping a gratitude journal can be profoundly healing.

Dynamics of Chronic Illness on Emotional Health

You may find yourself spending more time alone, excluded from events and gossipped about during a long-term illness. The mental and emotional toll can be devastating to our mental health and wellness. Understanding that you're not alone can be the first step in overcoming other people's detached behavior.
When you’re on the battlefield fighting an illness, especially for an extended period of time, you might discover you haven’t been able to reach out or be there for people and/or family members like you once were. Over the course of a thirteen years, I can attest I have missed out on many extra-curricular activities I once attended regularly adorned with bells. My father and his wife lived nine hours away and was used to me making the long pilgrimage to Dallas for holidays as well as caretaking during times of illness.

 

While I have a half-brother who lived thirty minutes away from my dad, I was the one he could count on. While I saw him through two messy marriages that took their toll on my overall health and wellness, I survived. I’m glad I’m wired this way, but it took a major vector born infection for me to set healthy boundaries. I found myself saying “no” more than “yes” and cancelling plans involving heavy socializing. Talking drained me on a physical level. I was better off at home on my bed, floating on my foam island, adrift in a stormy sea of virulent symptoms and unrelenting fatigue.

 

I lost my confidence at times, feeling awash in guilt and low self-esteem that I wasn’t good enough or “essential” anymore. So called “friends” treated me like a pariah at times. When other people came over for a visit, I was unable to be the bubbly hostess tending to everyone’s hospitality needs. A few acquaintances began exhibiting behavior of disgust, frustration and anger in my presence while visiting my home. Some family members became hostile towards me, treating me like I was somehow a criminal. One accused me of being misdiagnosed, insisting Lyme could be successfully treated over the course of two weeks with proper anti-biotic treatment. I wish that was the case. One size doesn’t fit all when it comes to borrelia burgdorferi.
 
Battling a long-term illness can feel like living through nuclear war. After the initial blasts of different competing symptoms begin to wane, we often find our former lifescape in rubble. All we can do is survey the damage and continue marching forward with an enlightened perspective uniquely gained from our tailor-made tours of duty.
The aftermath of a long-term illness is comprised of different layers of emotional fallout. While we might feel the need for an underground bunker to escape the toxicity from others, a chronic illness FORCES us to establish and maintain healthy boundaries. Looking back, I spent too much time fretting over how hateful other people were towards me. I couldn’t imagine treating anyone going through physical turmoil like they did, but it happened. Now, I choose not to accept bad behavior. Instead, I see it as other people projecting their own misery and unhappiness onto the most vulnerable…bullying, in a way. 

People who lack empathy or understanding tend to lash out when they can’t control you. My heart aches over people in my life who’ve chosen this path. I can’t imagine spending all of my years on this earth in such a negative, unexamined state of mind and I can’t change them. Persecution often accompanies sickness. Trials and tribulations test our faith, therefore serve a divine purpose. I believe we are called to patiently endure suffering. The book of Job is a powerful reminder.
When I let the misery of others take root in my psyche, I turn it over to God, rinse and repeat. What I’ve come to realize is that when you’re sick, you become an easy target, and it’s human nature to take out rage and anger on the most vulnerable. Look at what happens in convalescent homes.
Throughout my ordeal, time has chiseled away at the mountain of uncertainty regarding who my real friends are and what my purpose is. I’ve discovered there are many angels who have stuck by my side, some I wouldn’t meet until I was knee deep in Lyme. Warriors, I call them. Plus, my husband. I’m blessed to have him next to me. I pray you have someone to share your journey of wisdom that can only be gained through the lens of long-term illness. When the dust settles. I’ll bet you have your share of war stories to share!

The Storm of Unbearable Suffering Delivered Me from My Past

Forgive yourself for being sick. When you've been plucked form the world, be patient and loving towards yourself and embrace the changes going on. You're riding a storm to greater spiritual understanding. In times of tremendous distress, God is reaching down for us, ready to take our hand. We may never know his reason, but in that alone we are delivered.
                               Chapter 1
During through a long-term illness can be one of the most difficult experiences in your life. No one can truly prepare you for the obstacles you’ll face when your body is run down for an extended period of time. When I was going through the acute stage of Lyme, I felt like aliens had taken over my system. My family lived eight hours away and my friends were busy raising children and having careers. No one was coming to save me.

 

In the throes of mosquito born encephalitis, raging fevers and tonic-clonic seizures, I’d never felt more alone and scared. I did my best to articulate why I could no longer drop everything to travel and take care of family members like I used to nor tend to their needs. I felt misunderstood, neglected and ultimately depressed. Family accused me of being misdiagnosed, and often minimized suffering I endured and continue to on occasion. Depression set in like early evening darkness flooding the sky in fall. 
Knowing I was enduring fully disseminating Lyme was horrific. I swore I could feel the bugs boring into my internal organs as the infection raged.
When I could, I read everything online about how to treat this complex multi-systemic disease, discovering the disheartening news that many Texas doctors lost their licenses over treating Lyme patients with long-term antibiotics, or even diagnosing patients with it in the first place.
I also came to learn about Lyme induced depression, anxiety and other worsening mood disorders including P.T.S.D. arising from getting infected with it in the first plac
Healing from chronic illness is a non-linear process. While you're on the road to recovery, redefine the outdated definition of setbacks. Accept them as the highs and lows of a process, gentle reminders that recovery occurs in stages.
As my health continued to decline, I realized I was completely at the mercy of an unseen enemy invasion, and that my life as I knew it was over. I was stuck at home and fended for myself, mostly. Luckily, I had a nurse practitioner who prescribed me triple antibiotic therapy for several months. I stopped midway through month four. My stomach was done. 
I felt worse for wear and hopeless. The spontaneous, formerly employed hard-working career-oriented girl with two Bachelor of Science degrees was reduced to someone who couldn’t muster the strength to change the channel, dress, shower or carry on a conversation. What was ordinary and routine was jerked out from under me. The idea that God was working on me hadn’t fully set in, yet. 
Stricken with chronic fatigue, uncontrollable muscle jerking and unresolved malarial symptoms, I was no longer a part of the world. I came to recognize the sounds of morning and afternoon traffic, and the deafening silence between. I missed my old life, the freedom and mirth. I prided myself on being independent and resilient, however, many parts of me were badly broken. Emotionally, I hadn’t resolved much of the violence and abuse I endured at the hands of irresponsible people and family members. I carried on too long keeping pain and anger bottled up.

 

I watched a lot of movies during the day. Halloween was approaching and I was already in costume to play death warmed over. The year was 2011 and Texas was undergoing one of the most severe droughts I can recall. Looking through the window when I could tolerate a glimmer of light, (Lyme can make you extremely light and sound sensitive), the grass was unnaturally orange, a supernatural hue of color well past yellow indicating an insufferable lack of moisture. Death was all around. I felt miniscule in its presence.

 

While our physical beings suffer, nothing can destroy our spirit if we remain humble. Everyone's purpose is unique. Don't allow the world to define you.
                            Chapter 2
I began experiencing unusually vivid dreams in vibrant colors as though I was in a tropical forest full of supernatural, undiscovered creatures. Sometimes, in the middle of the night, I woke myself up laughing hysterically. Astonished, I researched online a possible meaning for this odd phenomenon. I discovered this behavior was called being tickled by the spirit. Longing for logic, I realized no amount of it would save me, as there was little to none on record back then to clarify much of what I was going through. 

 

Instinctively, at this point, I believed that God removed me from the world to not only humble me, but to protect me from something possibly more catastrophic lurking in the outside world. No one that I know of believed me except for a very close friend. She prayed for me every night to experience Jesus’ love. 
Finally, one night inside of a dream, I was walking through a Romanesque outdoor pavilion under a dusky sky twinkling with bright stars. Instinctively, I was aware I was in heaven. Across the way, I was drawn by a man encapsulated by a ball of white light streaming from all around. As I approached, I reached out my hand to touch the individual surrounded by light only to become overwhelmed with love unlike I have ever felt in my life. I didn’t want to let go. I knew I was experiencing Jesus and his eternal love.
I struggled to let go of the light, as I became aware I was in a dream. When I awoke, I immediately contacted my friend, Irene, who was diligently praying for me to thank her. I pray for all of you reading this to experience the love of Jesus. 

 

During this period of disability, my diet was terrible. I began to take stock of the food and beverages I was consuming. While I’m naturally thin, I wasn’t paying attention to the highly inflammatory agents loaded in my meals. When the fatigue was crippling, I grabbed for a Monster, diet Coke or coffee. Beginning to examine my life, my perspective on life began to change. I’ve come to accept that healthy change requires patient endurance through all circumstances, extraordinary or benign.
Being as sick as I was back then, I was overcome by gratitude for everything I had, my husband being number one. Staring at the ceiling when I couldn’t move, I was exceedingly thankful for the roof over my head, for a solid house with electricity, running water, and indoor plumbing. Lyme effects so many people without these seemingly common resources. I found myself truly blessed.
The acute symptoms waned through the passage of time. By December I stood on the scale and discovered I had gained fifteen pounds. The prolonged antibiotic treatment had destroyed my stomach lining. I wasn’t able to eat or drink the way I used to. New health issues and concerns collaborating with old ones pivoted me on a journey to restore my entire being. 
The world inflicts trauma and pain as well as nourishes us. Like scar tissue left behind from injury, spirits can break. Knowing we are valuable during seasons of illness is so important to remember. Pastor Mike Shreib made a three-part video series titled, “The Benefits of Suffering” during his stage four terminal cancer battle.
I was grateful and relieved to discover God polishes us when we suffer. He’s blessing us with fruits of the spirit. Love, compassion, forgiveness, gratitude…soul gifts from trusting in Jesus no matter how deeply we hurt. 

 

My KJV large print study bible by C. Hudson provides definitions and summaries.

This KJV large print study bible by Christopher Hudson simplifies understanding of the greatest book ever written.
Utilizing brief summaries and concordance/dictionary definitions of biblical terms will help you gain understanding of the King James Version.

Wear your favorite essential oil to improve your well-being. Add several dops onto a colorful refill pad for an enjoyable, aromatherapy experience!

These divine words keep me going everyday.
                                     Chapter 3
Had I known about the massive storm brewing on the horizon, I might not have lived to tell you. Over the past ten plus years, my face and neck were persistently hot to the touch. I believed this to be a result of the initial fever from the Lyme infection. As a result, I followed a liquid diet protocol, drank activated coconut charcoal husk infused water, (tasted like a fire pit), for days at a time in an effort to detoxify my system, sending my body into starvation mode. Little did I know the storm of acute facial pain stemming from trigeminal neuralgia was about to send me subterranean.

 

One fateful morning, my husband went to kiss me on the side of the cheek before leaving for work, sending me doubled over in pain as though lightening had struck. Please read “In the Devil’s Grip, My Trigeminal Neuralgia Nightmare” at the bottom of my blog for a fully detailed account of an inflamed facial nerve. This condition can be caused by several factors, including Lyme disease, facial trauma, or pressure on the nerve where it enters the brain stem. Nevertheless, it is the most painful condition known to man. It’s also referred to as the suicide disease. With proper pain management, nutrition, posture and sleep, it DOESN’T have to be!
The TN nerve depicted in yellow is a monster when it’s injured or inflamed. There are millions of unseen sensory nerves branching off the main nerve bundle responsible for pain, touch and temperature sensation. When this monster came to town, I met my match. My worthy opponent…the devil, himself.
I called upon my faith in ways I never had. While it took months to get under control, I went through hell.
Whatever issues I had regarding people and/or situations in the past, all I could do was live in and for the moment.

 

I sought God with all of my might. I fought to live another day, sometimes taking life one hour at a time. I believe that God allowed this medical condition to strike me in order to keep me close to him, to hear my calling and to break free from the chains of this world.
After my last bout, from which I’m still recovering, I felt forsaken for a while. The pain was so intense, I didn’t believe I would survive for long. Unable to place any weight on one side of my body, I went barefoot to my doctor’s office for Botox injections. In the waiting room, I asked God and Jesus if they had forgotten me. 
Keeping a daily prayer map helps me express my needs, concerns and prayers all in one thoughtfully guided journal. During times of immense suffering, keeping a guided prayer map can help you navigate through the trenches of an illness while nurtuturing your relationship with God.
Keeping a prayer map helps me to navigate through everyday life with a chronic illness. I can look back and see how much I've endured through tribulations. For each date, there are two pages to guide you through your walk with The Lord.
Tremendous suffering is an opportunity to put us back in touch with the one who saved us.
During this period of extreme tribulation, I relistened to “The Benefits of Suffering” by Pastor Mike Shreib countlessly. I knew from before that suffering either brings us closer to God or destroys us. I held on in full belief that God never gives us more than we can handle. 

 

It took all of my strength and fortitude to keep going even in faith. Finally, I was prescribed a medication designed to shut off the pain signal from the TN, and I was able to get caught up on months of little to no sleep and begin to eat more frequently and brush my teeth, shower and move around more. 
I recall specifically telling God I would help other people with this condition, including Lyme as well as all other sicknesses as best I could from all of my life’s experience if/when he would ever deliver me. I acknowledge I was bargaining with him at first, something many of us do when we find ourselves in impossible situations. Accepting I might not ever fully recover, I vowed to be a beacon of light using the talents he bestowed upon me in this life, which includes writing, to help others enduring suffering. 
Please don’t give up on yourself, no matter what trials you’re facing. I dedicate this blog to you on your wellness journey. Give yourself the chance to heal your body, mind and spirit.  God will never forsake you.

"And the Lord said to Moses, take unto thee sweet spices, stacte, and onycha, galbanum; these sweet spices with pure frankincense: of each shall there be a like weight:" Exodus 30:34

The Benefits of Suffering Part One
Pastor Mike Shreib

Benefits of Suffering
Part Two

Benefits of Suffering
Part Three

Enhancing Home Security While You're Sick

You're on Duty!

Keeping your home safe and secure is one of the many ways of taking your power back whether on or off the battlefield.
For many of us living with chronic illness, we understand what it means to be debilitated. Often, our homes go neglected for long stretches as well as our physical beings weaken. While it’s more than possible we can recover, I’ve discovered there are many ways to tighten and reinforce home security while we heal. 

 

After a decade on the neuro-Lyme war zone, I began to notice the state of decline in my neighborhood. As the once cute and tidy post WW2 bungalow style homes fell into disrepair, I noticed an increasing number of strangers on foot, or walkers, as I call them. 

 

Some made no qualm in their effort to case homes. One neighbor down the street began notifying the police after a drive by shooting in which over thirty 9mm. casings littered the street in front of a dilapidated rent house. Luckily, our neighbor had the foresight to install a Ring Cam soon after he moved in, capturing the incident on camera. The suspect was arrested and charged.

Still, I experienced heightened anxiety, especially during periods of being bedridden. After a subsequent series of vehicle break ins on our street, my husband set up Blink cameras on the interior and exterior of our home. This small step towards increasing our home security led to big changes in my overall self-defense strategy and sense of well being.
Day 1: Walk the perimeter of the interior of your dwelling. Whether it be an apartment, RV or home, take inventory of the condition of all windows and make note of the condition you find them. Are the locks or windowpanes loose/and or easily breeched? Congratulations! You’re on patrol!

Day 2: Check the condition of all doors in your dwelling. Are they well fitting? Are you able to easily insert your housekey into the lock, or is it a struggle? Do you have a keyless dead bolt installed to your front door? Do you have a dead bolt or the ability to lock your bedroom door from the inside? 
Take note of your findings and relax. Your subconscious is already hard at work at keeping you safe. Believe it or not, your newfound awareness sends a subliminal message to would be intruders not to mess with you. So much of the world we live in is unseen in the visible spectrum.

 

 

Connecting with like-minded professionals in the self-defense world will broaden your perspective on life. Arm yourself with knowledge.
Day 3: Connect with Self-Defense Professionals: Clear your mind as you go over your list. Before taking any drastic measures, consult a professional locksmith, home security professional or local law enforcement agency (non-emergency). Call or visit your local gun range or martial arts studio. 

 

Connecting with other, like-minded individuals or groups will enhance your perspective on life in general and give you a renewed sense of purpose. You are worth fighting for! 
Welcome expert knowledge. Being informed and making well informed decisions concerning your personal safety increase your chances of survival, and in my experience, encourage healing.
             “A Violent Crime Survivor, I Understand “
A survivor of violent crime, I understand the importance of protecting yourself from dangerous individuals. My breakthrough healing from a vicious attack perpetrated by a stranger occurred when I learned to handle a firearm from a professional gun instructor referred by my local gun range. 
After taking a two-day tactical firearms safety and self-defense course, I took and passed my conceal carry test. While I’m also armed with other means of protection, I am well equipped to defend myself in a life-threatening situation.
Day 4: Dust off windowsills and wipe doorknobs clean: With a feather duster or old cloth, dust off windowsills and ledges. If you’re your up to it, clean the interior windowpanes. By keeping this area clean, it indicates someone is present and mindful of their surroundings. The same goes for interior and exterior doorknobs. By paying attention to minor details, a potential criminal is alerted that someone in the dwelling is paying attention.
Day 5: Order/acquire necessary parts or replacements to home protection hardware. If you discover you need a keyless deadbolt or new windowpane, today is the day to take action. Take advantage of the online marketplace. 
If you need help later on with installation, contact a well- established, trustworthy locksmith or professional contractor. For windowpane replacement, contact your local glass company. Be sure to ask for an estimate and read the reviews on the vendor’s website. Be sure to research a perspective handyman. Ask for references and valid identification, if your gut feeling tells you.
Take necessary measurements before you call. Write them down and leave a space for an estimate. If you or anyone in the home is unable to replace the glass, the company may send an employee to better evaluate the situation. Often, you will receive a time frame for a service call. Once your technician arrives, he may not immediately need to gain indoor entrance. At some point during an installation of a new glass pane, for example, he will need access from inside. 
              Protect Yourself During a Service Call
If your feeling concerned about being alone during a service call, be sure to have a friend or relative with you. Ditch the nightgown for jeans and a t-shirt, slide on a pair of tennis shoes or boots, (including shoes you can make a getaway in) and remain aware. Put away personal items such as sleepwear and prescription medications. If someone arrives that makes you feel uncomfortable, call the business and explain. Most companies are eager to provide you with outstanding customer service. 
Arm yourself with a self-defense weapon you’re most skilled/comfortable with. Being able to protect yourself promotes inner strength and confidence, natural deterrents we may not be born with, but acquire when we’re prepared.
If you discover the windows are easily breeched, gather as many empty, tin cans, jars or spare glasses and fill them with loose change and line the windowsills. If someone tries to penetrate through the glass, you will hear the crashing of coins first, which will more than likely scare off a potential intruder, giving you time to call for help.
Most service technicians/repairmen undergo throrough background checks and are insured by their employers. If one arrivesi an unmarked vehicle, call the company to verify his/her identity.A self-employed contractor will be bonded by the state. Check online

Suffering Polishes Us

For many of us, suffering isn’t anything new. By the very definition of the word, it it means the state of undergoing pain, distress or hardship. According to the Bible, suffering is a product of the fall, a consequence of human sin against God or simply, a byproduct of living in a fallen world. Regardless of who’s fault it is or why, I consider it the battlefield. 
No one is exempt. For many of us fighting illness, it’s a psychological, emotional, mental and spiritual theatre of war. These four acts can be the most formidable opponents we face as human beings. Looking back, I recall the unpleasantness of grief when my father passed. I wasn’t sure I could bear the pain, but over time, it lessened. Knowing he is with The Lord, feeds my spirit.

 

Fighting this illness and all its accoutrements require daily food for thought. When I’m feeling dull from brain fog, I’ll make a pot of peach herbal tea. The deliberate process of filling a pot with water, lighting the gas stove and waiting for it to whistle are intuitively comforting. Pouring the amber liquid into a pretty cup on a saucer are ways to show love and care for yourself. In this you are feeding your soul.

 

If we are going to make it through this world of crisis to crisis with affliction of any kind, we owe it to ourselves to be honest, forgiving, gentle, loving, patient and happy towards ourselves. We don’t need validation from the world anymore. Not everyone is going to understand, and losing former friends over it might happen. Everything will turn out the way it’s supposed to be. In this we walk in faith. In this we are delivered.

 

 

 

American Poison, Killer Drinking Water on Tap

If you’ve ever lived on a farm or rural property, you may know how sweet well water can be. Once you’ve experienced it, nothing else will do. Pure Artesian water is heavenly in any ways. Back on the ranch, our spring fed lake brimmed with impenetrable hues of grey and blue. Everyday, I walked our dogs around it, losing myself in the tranquility of the lifegiving bubbling spring.
It amazed me water could ceaselessly flow from the ground. I wish we still had our place. I miss the sprawling land, endless skies and self-sufficiency from living closely to the land. Even the fish we caught tasted earthy and sweet. Back then, I dug up my own earthworms for bait.
So much has changed since then. Now, I’m living in a large city with frequent water boils, rolling brownouts during the heat of summer and miles of roads in disrepair. I know I’m not alone. American drinking water standards now allow for an untold amount of carcinogenic, forever chemicals including 90 contaminates. https://www.epa.gov/sdwa Despite growing national critical infrastructure failures, including countless toxic train derailments and refinery explosions, there are measures we can take to curtail potentially deadly consequences while our country’s welfare hangs in the balance. 

 

Basic water treatment plant to filter our surface water supply from a lake reservoir. For a complete list of chemicals lurking in our water supply, check out the following link: https://www.evowatersystems.com/what-do-whole-house-filters-remove/
 
The Evo 1000 activated charcoal coconut husk filter and sediment filter reside in the two blue containers. The UV light filter (on the far left) disinfects deadly bacteria the city municipal water treatment system often misses. You'll sleep better during a water boil knowing life can go on as usual. This affordable system is perhaps the best insurance against chemical warfare, bioterrorism or other forms of cyberattacks on our critical, life-sustaining infrastructure.
After decades of being at the mercy of countless failures and lack of basic, oversight standards pertaining to clean and safe drinking water, we decided on a system that could handle heavy chloride, refinery contaminants, chemical plant waste and iron/rust removal. I chose a salt-free system to eliminate the ruinous salt air corrosion on all of our appliances, including hot water heater, washing machine, faucets and stove-top (from cleaning). After years of exposure, my long hair was dry and brittle. I ended up cutting over six inches to salvage healthy, new growth. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/water-pollution-and-human-health

 

The stress of living under toxic water duress took a major toll on my life. Unless you have access to a well or spring, (considering it’s not next to a fracking site) then you know the feeling of being held hostage by the city tap. Afraid to open my mouth in the shower or my eyes, I quickly bathed, rinsing my hair with store bought mineral water when I could afford it.
The basic Evo Water filtration system includes a state of the art activated charcoal coconut husk and sediment filter proven to remove a growing, poisonous list of forever chemicals (PFAS etc.) contaminating the drinking water.   https://www.evowatersystems.com/what-do-whole-house-filters-remove The steel tubular device to the left of the two blue tubes is a UV light filer which kills harmful bacteria and viruses evading municipal water treatment processes. I chose this system due to its ability to remove deadly forever chemicals and constant presence of dangerous pathogens detected in our drinking water. https://www.evowatersystems.com/product-category/uv-water-purification-systems/
We’re also situated closely to chemical, refinery and fracking plants, a widespread phenomenon if you live anywhere in Texas. We discovered after Erin Brockovich visited city council in our region to discuss safe alternatives to ensure safer drinking water that not a single representative we pay our hard-working tax dollars to was open to new ideas or improvement of services. After she left, the city responded by dumping intolerable amounts of chlorine into the water supply. Deciding not to be a victim any longer, we invested in the gift that keeps on giving…purified water from the tap.
 PARTIAL LIST OF PFAS, PFOA and PFOS in YOUR HOME and ENVIRONMENT
1. cleaning supplies
2. fingernail polish
3. pesticides
4. construction waste
5. aerospace materials waste
6. pharmaceutical/medical waste
7. electronic industrial waste
8. refinery waste
9. production of firefighting foam used to extinguish petroleum-based fires (Palestine, Ohio)
A native Texan, I was stunned to learn the water used to extinguish the Palestine toxic train derailment was shipped to Texas Molecular, a hazardous waste facility in Houston. Twenty of the affected cars contained hazardous chemicals including benzine, vinyl chloride, ethylene glycol and ethylhexyl acrylate to name a few. https://www.epa.gov/east-palestine-oh-train-derailment
Upon further investigation, cancer causing catastrophes like this happen frequently. In 2018, millions of gallons of toxic water were delivered daily by tankers from North Carolina to Deer Park in Houston, Texas after the Chemours chemical plant was caught discharging GenX, an industrial byproduct, into the Cape Fear River. https://theintercept.com/2019/02/01/chemours-genx-north-carolina-netherlands/ GenX, also known as perfluoro-2-propoxypropanoic acid, is one of many forever chemicals, including PFAS, PFOA and PFOS, used to make Teflon, fast food wrappers and other plastic products such as Scotch Guard, surfaced in North Carolina’s drinking water.
Apparently, Texas Molecular’s deep well injection system “restores” wastewater from many toxic chemical spill disasters by injecting them more than seven thousand feet below the surface of the earth into the shale. This kind of disposal process has been in practice since the 1930’s with Dupont leading the forefront. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S016756480552001X Considered cheap and cost effective, many industries have depended on this means of cleaning up their dirty work for close to a century.
The fact our once, clean water is now flammable in areas of Texas is sobering, making the installation of a whole house water filter one of the most important components of an emergency preparedness plan. Offering frequent specials and discounts, there’s no better time to start protecting yourself against unprecedented biowarfare with an affordable water filtration and purification system by Evo. https://www.evowatersystems.com/product/whole-house-water-filter/?oid=1&affid=23

Teflon free, non-toxic cookware is essential for healthy cooking.

10.5" Non Stick Skillet by Caraway
Caraway naturally non-stick pots and pans are free from PTFE, PFOA, PFAS, lead, cadmium and other toxic chemicals.
Naturally non-stick, they require less oil for cooking and less scrubbing during clean-up.
Be sure to add the UV, bacteria killing light to the basic system. Our Evo 1000 included one activated coconut charcoal husk filter and one sediment filter. After coupons and specials, the total was around $700.00 (not including UV light) The sediment filter can be reused after rinsing thoroughly once a year depending on the toxic burden of your drinking water. 
Overall, yearly replacement of the two filters totals $123.00. With do-it-yourself instructions included in your kit, keep in mind hiring a licensed plumber unless you or someone you know has water filter installation experience.
The customer service goes above and beyond to help you select the correct system to fit your families needs. This system requires little maintenance. Sincere, personalized customer service is available over the phone with professional experts dedicated to providing you the correct system for your specific needs.
For a better understanding of how a coconut activated carbon filter works, please check out the short video.

Industry Standard Deep Well Injection Processes

Texas Molecular's deep well underground injection system diagram.
While there exists a means for industrial waste disposal, there are too many variables to rest comfortably with current drinking water standards. Would you drink from the tap knowing it’s laden with plastics that don’t break down into harmless debris? What if deep well injection sites leak? 
It’s shocking how uninformed the vast majority of us are when it comes to understanding the deadly effects of so-called modern wastewater disposal practices on our health, welfare and the environment. Ultimately, hazardous waste management companies bury industrial poisons deep beneath the ground, bypassing the groundwater table by making perforations in the shale. The earth has tides. The plates are constantly shifting.
In order to truly heal from any illness, knowledge is power. Understanding how our nation produces and recovers from toxic spills provide invaluable insight into the wizardry behind the fragile state our modern infrastructure and natural resources. Do you suspect contaminated drinking water is making you sick or exacerbating an unresolved ailment such as gastritis, lowered immune system, kidney failure, respiratory issues or persistent skin/systemic inflammation? I can only answer yes for myself, and possibly others victimized by the gross negligence of corporate, county and municipal entities in charge of the most precious resource known to man.
For a complete list of the 25 cities with the worst drinking water, please visit: https://bestlifeonline.com/worst-drinking-water/
The grim reality is we can no longer count on the tap to deliver purified, safe drinking water. In this day and age, fracking sites have multiplied like rabbits, leaving flammable forever chemicals leaking into the dwater table. Over the past decade, I flew back and forth to a major, Texas metropolitan city to care for a relative. During the flight, I looked out the window, in awe of what I thought to be endless subdivision plots. The monotonous of sameness was a bitter pill to swallow. 

How could every future homesite look exactly alike? It wasn’t until a stewardess informed me the endless swaths of land were covered with fracking sites. My heart sank at the ruthless plight for natural gas resources. The land appeared raped and pillaged. I’d seen news reports of the devasting effects of fracking chemicals leaking into the water supply of unsuspecting residents. Lighting it on fire is something out of a horror film. 

According to the Daily Mail, 17.6 million people live a mile or closer to an oil or gas well that could cause cancer, dementia, birth defects or heart disease from the fumes alone.   https://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-4814138/Fracking-sites-expose-17-6-million-Americans-toxins.html
You owe it to yourself, family and pets to purify and filter your drinking water. Rest in the assurance of having the means to store pristine water.
EPS standards are weakening every day in the name of progress and residential expansion. The recent Supreme Court ruling in the Sackett case was shocking.  https://www.cbsnews.com/news/supreme-court-epa-clean-water-act/

Bottle Your Own Liquid Gold!

Store as much water as you possibly can. Water lines get cut, water mains break and mandatory water boils can sever you from this life giving element.

Storing Filtered Water Can Be The Difference Between Life and Death

Brio 5 gallon water containers won't degrade in high temperatures. After the Ohio train derailment, none of us can afford to be without safely stored filtered water.

Here in the U.S., our once pristine rivers and lakes are testing poisonous with forever, cancer causing toxic chemicals. Depending on your geographic location, you may not be aware of the hazards freely flowing through your pipes. After years of being at the mercy of our city’s constant water boils, we dipped into our savings to invest in an Evo Water whole house filtration system.
After discovering of our tap water was potentially tied into a hazardous chemical plant, we were frequently warned against coming into contact with it, regardless of if being boiled. The city reacted by dumping noxious loads of chloride into the tap to flush out major water lines. The gas flowing out of the pipes was intolerable to inhale, ingest or touch without experiencing skin rash, redness, shortness of breath or upset stomach. 
After professionally installing Evo Water Systems whole house filter with pathogen killing UV light, https://www.evowatersystems.com/product/whole-house-water-filter/?oid=1&affid=23 we have peace of mind unless the tap itself is shut off.  Last summer when the water main broke, we were able to carry on cooking, bathing and watering a small garden because we had recently started storing water. For a list of the top ten best water softeners in 2023, please visit https://buyersguide.org/top-10-guide/water-softener
I began storing it for emergencies in high-quality, polycarbonate five-gallon jugs with reusable cap from Brio. https://amzn.to/41m2oDU I’ve discovered water storage containers are difficult, if not impossible to find at local grocers or area Wal Marts since the 2020 pandemic. Heads up, everyone. Don’t let the single most important element flow through your fingers during a crisis. Bottled water is the first item to sell out when people are in panic mode, which is quite often these days.

Where Did Native Americans Find Their Drinking Water?

I often wonder if a catastrophe took out our utilities and/or grid, how would we go about finding a fresh water source? Curious as how the native American’s obtained drinking water, I discovered they depended mainly on streams and rivers. Unlike us, they weren’t big on storing up or using that much water in the first place.

 

Wealthy natives often drank tea or whisky. Drinking it directly from their hands or storing it in an animal stomach, the availability of fresh water wasn’t something they worried about. To this day, we still don’t how they purified it. https://www.quora.com/How-did-the-Native-Americans-on-the-pl
I can only imagine how pristine the lakes, rivers and streams once were. Have you ever wondered how you would survive if water suddenly stopped running from the tap? Do you have a backup source like a well or large-gallon tank? For many of us not connected to a well or situated next to a clear running spring, the outlook is sobering. Perhaps everyone should consider a rain catchment system. https://amzn.to/3NYHJma
Due to the recent La Nina, many areas of the United States experienced extreme drought deluge rain events. http://www.cpc.ncep.noaa.gov/products/predictions/30day/fxus05.html
 

Where Does Our Drinking Water Come From?

It's a sad state of affairs when the water running from your faucet isn't safe to drink or even touch. If there is only one item you can afford to invest in for emerency preparedness, consider a whole house water filtration system.
Most of American tap water originates from lakes, rivers and groundwater. For a majority of the United States, our water flows from intake points to a treatment plant, then into a storage tank (plainly visible in most towns), directly to our homes through a series of pipe systems. 
          The basic 4 step process used to filter our water:
1. Coagulation and flocculation– Various chemicals are added to the water to bind with dirt and other dissolved particles which in turn form larger particles called floc.
2. Sedimentation– Floc is heavy and settles to the bottom of the tank.
3. Filtration– The remaining clear water on top passes through filters composed of sand, gravel and charcoal to remove dissolved particles including dust, parasites, bacteria, viruses and other chemicals.
4. Disinfection-Chlorine or chloramine is added to kill parasites, bacteria, viruses and germs. Apparently, fluorine is added to prevent tooth decay. 
Even after all of these steps the city takes to filter our drinking water, our local tap water isn’t safe to drink or touch at times. Taking control of your tap water means filtering it at home. It’s the most important asset we have!

Find a water filtration system that's right for you.

As the world shifts into a technological age of uncertainty, nothing is more important than having healthy food on hand and access to purified, clean drinking water. Living in South Texas, our water supply is constantly under boil alerts. Sometimes, we’re advised to not come into physical contact with it. 

 

Typically, within hours of a water boil alert or hurricane warning, customers have already wiped the shelves clean. Within minutes, the water windmills are fully occupied and emptied.
During the polar freeze of 2020, people stripped the shelves bare at our local grocery store in a panic buying frenzy. Lines of people standing in freezing temperatures wrapped around the grocery store.

What's in your water? Visit www.epa.gov

Self-Defense Strategies when You're in the Trenches of Chronic Illness (Lyme)

Having been homebound for more than a decade, I could tell I was losing my people skills. In my pre-Lyme life, I worked a variety of high-volume jobs, interacting with the general public for long periods of time. When my health allowed, I managed a business. 
One day, I heard a lot of commotion outside of our home. I peeked through the blinds, (feeling like Mrs. Kravitz) and was stunned by the number of workmen gathered on the lawn next door to me. Our neighbor ran a make-ready business which attracted a lot of strangers and unfamiliar vehicles.

One man wandered from the neighbor’s lawn over into ours heavily intoxicated. Plainly visible through the living room window in broad daylight, I discovered he had no teeth and was covered in prison tattoos. 

Little did I know at the time, he would be living out of his run-down pick-up truck parked in front of our home. He was scary looking. I don’t mean to be judgmental, but he terrified me for a while. My husband traveled heavily at the time, which heightened the fear and anxiety I had over the situation next door. I wanted to be a good neighbor, but my alarm bells were going off. 

I needed groceries. I hadn’t planned any meals for the week and had a long list of items. At some point, I would have to toughen up and face the debilitating anxiety keeping me from leaving the house. I know I’m not alone in this ongoing battle. It’s part and parcel of being cooped up with a long-term illness.
 
Poor planning, isolation compounded with a visible threat worsened the anxiety I was already experiencing. I had to face my fears. As I was getting ready, I imagined a scenario of what I would do if he approached me. Just in case, I made plans to attend a weekend self-defense class that forever changed my life.
I learned from law enforcement how to say “STOP” before someone enters your personal space. 
My husband installed basic security cameras and I started carrying a taser. I keep back up pepper spray in my purse or on my person in an easy to get to pocket when I’m going anywhere on foot. Walking with purpose no matter how poorly you feel will make you feel stronger and in more in control of your surroundings. 
Take inventory when you venture outside of your neighborhood. Scan your environment for anything unusual and jot it down on a notepad you keep in your purse or inside the glovebox. Awareness of your surroundings is one of the greatest self-defense mechanisms. 
 

Pay attention to people on foot walking closely to your vehicle. Keep your personal protection device within reach. Shout STOP to anyone breeching your space.If they don't respond, it's up to you to protect yourself. Don't count on passerby's to render aid.
It wasn’t long after I equipped myself with fundamental tools and knowledge to protect myself that I would come face to face encounter with some of the individuals loitering on our street. Many times, after walking outside to my vehicle, I crossed paths with someone on foot passing directly behind my car. 

On those occasions, I would stop and let them pass before attempting to enter my vehicle, keeping my taser within reach, if not directly in hand. (Often, I wear long sleeve shirts or a hoodie to conceal my personal protection device.
I longed to move, but we couldn’t afford to. Practicing readiness and awareness was key to my quality of life and still is to this day.
Due to the significant, economic downturn, many once thriving middle-class neighborhoods have fallen into disrepair.
The creeper living out of his old pick-up turned out not to be as creepy as I imagined. Remain vigilant and carry a weapon when you leave the house. Stay on guard at all times.
While many of the once, cute bungalow style houses on our street were falling into ruin, my husband and I managed to keep ours neat and tidy. However, I completely stopped doing anything lawn and leaf out front. We hired a landscaper to mow and edge, which drastically reduced my exposure to the vagrants and walkers. (People on foot cutting through our neighborhood to shorten the distance to the closest grocery store.)

 

I noticed the man living in the pick-up truck wave to me in a friendly, non- threatening manner and I said hello. Without hesitation, he approached me and began to share his entire life history in graphic detail, including a lengthy stint in the penitentiary. 
I had just put supper in the oven and didn’t have much time to spare. I listened intently for a short while, then excused myself from the conversation.

I actually felt much better, despite the horrific tales of an unfortunate life he mostly brought upon himself. I surmised he was fairly non-threatening and was able to let all of most the fear and anguish I was rent with go.  While I don’t advise anyone to chat with the individual who feels threatening to you, I believe when the student is ready the teacher arrives.
Vipertek taser is available from Amazon. It fits securly in hand and is rechargeable.
If we hadn’t had that exchange, I might not have been able to move on. At one point, I notified a friend in law enforcement who said they couldn’t really do anything about the situation. He wasn’t harming anyone, and our next-door neighbor clearly welcomed him to stay with her.

I was truly forced to face my fears, up close and personal. I had the means to stop him in his tracks if he got out of line.

Never go anywhere away from home unarmed. If you’re homebound, keep a weapon on you at all times. I learned this from my friend in law enforcement who runs undercover homeland operations. He instructed me blatantly that a woman, especially, needs to be armed inside the home, even going from the kitchen to the laundry room.

 

Stomach on Fire: My Gastritis Nightmare

             Chapter 1   
      Fire Breathing Monsters
Energy drinks were a last-ditch effort to add some spring to my step. I drank them in the afternoon to combat the intractable chronic fatigue I couldn’t shake despite their bitter, medicinal taste. The combination of powerful herbal stimulants blended with artificially sweetened carbonated water offered a short-lived boost with a killer price. In fact, someone in passing warned me about their ill effects of Red Bull one week earlier, which went in one ear and out the other. (Angels also known as messengers come in many forms!) 

 

One afternoon after finishing an iced, cold Monster, I passed out on the bed in agonizing stomach pain. When I awoke, my stomach felt injured as though someone kicked me repeatedly in the gut. Unable to keep anything down, I was overcome by nausea, fever and chills, extreme muscle and joint weakness, dizziness, exhaustion, anxiety and depression. 
Little did I know it would be the beginning of a major lifestyle transformation through diet and clean living!
I looked up all of the symptoms I was having and quickly realized I was having an attack of gastritis. 

 

 I can’t blame everything on the Monster. Less than one month earlier, I was struggling to rid myself of a lingering viral infection which landed me in the minor ER. There, I was administered an IV steroid which unbeknownst to me, would set the stage for an acute gastritis attack for someone like me with a chronic infection such as Lyme disease.

 

I wasn’t fully armored at the time with this knowledge.
Also, the list of prescription drugs I was administered was growing in length, including the addition of another stimulant type of drug to alleviate the debilitating fatigue.
In the clutches of yet another debilitating syndrome, I jumped off the system’s merry-go-round cold turkey. I knew it would hurt for a little while, but in truth, it was THE BEST decision I ever made!

 

Essential oils such as lavender massaged into the stomach area can sooth an upset tummy. Apply 1:1 ratio of oil of lavender with a carrier oil such as coconut.

One Hour Rife Gastritis Pain Relief Healing Frequency

Discovering GlutaShield at the Compounding Pharmacy

I made an appointment with the pharmacist at our local compounding pharmacy and shared my war story. Thankfully, he let me in on GlutaShield. He explained that certain foods and medications were likely eroding the mucosal lining to the stomach causing leaky gut. (The slippery surface responsible for extracting and absorbing nutrients from the food we eat). He also emphasized the importance of maintaining proper PH balance in the stomach.  https://www.healthline.com/health/how-strong-is-stomach-acid
The pharmacist advised me to add kefir to my diet, specifically, Nancy’s Keifer. I located this powerful probiotic blend in the refrigerated section at our local health food store. (Try ordering it from Natural Grocery from Instacart if you’re homebound http://www.instacart.com) 

 

Relieved he had answers, the work I had ahead was daunting. I knew if I was to have any lasting quality of life, I would have to change everything I consumed. Coffee, tea, soda, acidic foods like tomatoes, food cooked or fried in canola oil, meaning restaurant food was out. https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/acidic-foods
As soon as I got into the car, I scooped a capful of the vanilla flavor powder into a liter of water and slowly drank it. Immediately, I felt soothing relief. This product saved my life at the time, and I never go without it to this day.

 

GlutaShield glutamine powder is one of the most powerfully healing supplements in my gastritis arsenal.

Eleven Hours of 528Hz Frequency Music For Bloating and Stomach Pain (wear headphones for optimal healing)

Chapter 2
GlutaShield Tamed the Flame
This powerful and amazing product changed my life forever. Understanding I would need to restore the proper PH in order for my tummy to heal was a lightbulb moment. I began to see how what I was experiencing was something akin to a chemically induced burn from persistent chemical exposure via pharmaceuticals, sports drinks, alcoholic beverages, acidic drinks (coffee, black tea and fruit juices), sodas, and ordinary inhalation of toxic fumes from everyday cleaning products.
Our gut, also known as the enteric system, is considered the body’s second brain, using the same chemicals and cells as the brain to digest as well as alert the brain when something is wrong. The stomach is a force to contend with when it’s unhappy.

 

The L-Glutamine and Deglycyrrhized Licorice Root Extract in GlutaShield helps protect and restore the lining of the digestive tract, AKA the mucosa. It also aids in wound healing, burns, trauma, infections and prolonged stress. All of these conditions can drastically lower the body’s natural ability to produce glutamine on its own. Adding L-glutamine in your diet assists in strengthening your immune system, as well.

 

     Taking Control of Your Health Can Be Delicious
Additionally, I changed my diet to include keifer, easily digestible, bland foods such as pureed vegetable soups, light pasta dishes (no tomatoes or vinegar/acidic dressings), baked or boiled sweet and regular potatoes, herbal tea (peach is my favorite), oven roasted squash, avocadoes, stewed okra, whole grain bread, baked or grilled fish, (salmon/cod/haddock/trout), smoked salmon on occasion, yogurt sweetened with dark honey(just a touch!), bananas, oatmeal, cream of wheat and my favorite coconut chocolate chip cookies. (I’ll share the recipe with you next time) I’m still on this diet today. I love it! 
 , 

 

I put one scoop of vanilla GlutaShield in a large bottle of room temperature, filtered water twice daily on an empty stomach until my condition resolved. I sipped on it throughout the day between meals and in the evening after supper.

Inside My Gastritis Arsenal

All of these items are readily available from your local grocery or compounding pharmacy or online. Make your own arsenal for whatever ails you so you can get well!
Over the years, I’ve turned to natural products more and more. While over the counter medications, such as Prilosec, Pepto Bismal and Alka Seltzer temporarily relieve stomach pain and burning, incorporating anti-inflammatory foods, essential oils as well as tummy soothing warm drinks provided more lasting relief. 
As a part of my everyday routine, I’ve featured an array of readily available, healthy choice products I utilize not only to heal an unhappy stomach, but also promote and maintain the mucosa lining.
To anyone looking to make gut friendly changes, the following products when used regularly, have brought me tremendous relief when used as part of a healthy lifestyle:
(Starting from the left)
1.Simply Organic Curry Powder (to add in warm almond milk with Mauka honey for a soothing, anti-inflammatory, anti-bacterial anytime drink) https://amzn.to/3nHcyBb
2.Ananda Professional 1000 mg. Full Spectrum Hemp Oil (excellent anti-nausea remedy/all natural/eases gastritis induced anxiety/stress) https://anandaprofessional.com
3.Aura Cacia Bergamot Essential Oil (add 2-3 drops to carrier oil, apply onto chest and heart area to uplift spirits/promote happiness)https://amzn.to/41hvrcv
4.Be Young Lavender Essential Oil (add 2-3 drops to carrier oil, massage into abdominal area for stomach upset/pain relief) https://amzn.to/3LCwxsW
5.GlutaShield Vanilla Ortho Molecular Products https://amzn.to/41CpTZQ (powerful healing powder drink mix loaded with vitamin E, Zinc, glutamine, and licorice to instantly soothe and rebuild mucosal lining)
6.Manuka Health Raw Manuka Honey https://amzn.to/3ofjSUx
7.Blue Diamond Almond Breeze Unsweetened Original almond milk. https://amzn.to/3A4nPyj

Bone Broth to the Rescue for Healing Chronic Digestive Issues

Below, I’ve itemized a list of common, recurring gastro-intestinal issues that have plagued me on the battlefield with Lyme and trigeminal neuralgia nerve pain. The stomach is considered our second brain, and when it’s constantly upset, a PH imbalance can be the root cause. Do not dismiss any stomach issues. For a complete list of bone broth’s incredible healing properties, please visit https://draxe.com/nutrition/bone-broth-benefits
I consider bone broth to be the one of the most important dietary assets to my gastritis, Lyme and facial pain arsenals. The stomach is our second brain. When we don't get enough collagen, our stomach lining, epthelial and muscle tissue are depleated from essential restorative building blocks.

  •  Nausea
  • Sweating after eating
  • Abdominal Pain
  • Fever
  • Chills
  • Stomach/Intestinal Burning
  • Ulcers
  • Weakness in arms and legs (extremities)
  • Flu-like symptoms
  • Passing out after eating
  • Loss of appetite
  • Coated tongue
  • Intolerance to acidic foods/beverages (tomato sauce, coffee, black tea, vinegar, lemon)

  • Persistent upset stomach
  • Bloating
  • Abdominal area hot to the touch
  • Heightened Anxiety
  • Irritability
  • Mood change
  • Chemical intolerance (through inhalation or transdermal)
  • Pharmaceutical intolerance (ingested/transdermal)                    

In the Devil's Grip
My Facial Pain/Trigeminal Neuralgia Nightmare
Part One

The trigeminal nerve supplies sensations to the face, mucous membranes, and other structures of the head. It's the motor nerve for the muscles of mastication (chewing). The three branches include the opthamalic nerve, maxillary nerve and mandibular nerve.
Seven years ago, I began to experience severe, acute bouts of lightning strike facial pain. Also known as trigeminal neuralgia, the super pain charged syndrome left me feeling like I was in the devil’s grip.
          Medication Side Effects Can Trigger Facial Pain
I was in the dark about this condition when my first episode jolted me into a hopeless world of unrelenting pain. I was brushing my teeth when lighting strike pain crisscrossed my face and teeth. During this time, I had been prescribed a medication to alleviate Lyme chronic fatigue. While it helped for a few hours, overall, it made everything worse. As a result, I started grinding my teeth in my sleep so hard that it inflamed my facial nerve.
Researching further, several of the medications I was prescribed to manage some of the more debilitating effects of Lyme reported teeth grinding side effects.
I located a facial pain specialist eager to find a solution. Unable to turn my head, eat or drink without unremitting facial nerve pain, I was unable to participate in life. The receptionist handed me a voluminous stack of patient entry forms which required distinct and precise details of my condition. Feeling overwhelmed, I scanned through the questions. Nothing mattered anymore.
I was caught in another system. Once I was seen by the doctor, he informed me he wanted to take a “conservative approach” in treating the pain.
This meant months of visits and a pricey orthotic appliance to realign my bite. I would have to wear both and upper and lower orthotic the rest of my life and during every meal. I agreed to it at first, but in reality, it was unreasonable. I looked and felt like a fool, plus I began to talk with a lisp. 
He finally agreed to injecting my masseter muscle with Botox. This procedure ultimately stopped the nightmarish pain in its fiery tracks. My entire body took over a year to heal from the concurrent brutal, multi-systemic inflammatory response brought on by the hot facial nerve.
This book offers a personalized and holistic approach to the diabling pain attacks of T.N.

Keeping track of crippling facial pain can lead you to potential triggers and assist medical professionals in successfully treating this devastating condition.

In The Devil's Grip
Part 2

Understanding the anatomy of the trigeminal nerve is an important step to the healing process. The largest of the cranial nerves, (there are 12 cranial nerves, the TN being the 5th),it extends throughout the brainstem, from the midbrain to the medulla and continues to the cervial cord and ultimately to the spinal cord. HIghlighted in green, this complex, multi functional nerve bundle communicates touch, pain and temperature to the brain.
I was grateful for the lasting relief from the Botox injections. However, adding up the total cost of the months long ordeal rang up close to six thousand dollars in total. I was encouraged to use my Care Credit card, which I had recently paid off. 
This financial trend of maxing out credit cards to put out multiple Lyme fires is common with many of us suffering from chronic illness. For most of us on a lifelong battlefield, what other choice do we have? For one, we can educate ourselves and ask for what we need. If we don’t advocate on our own behalf, no one will do it. We owe it to ourselves to STOP being victimized by the system. 
Finally free of pain. life returned somewhat to normal. Dealing with late-stage, neuro Lyme is truly an invisible illness, and if you are experiencing one, you know all about the fragile breaks from living between volatile expressions of illness, stretches of time when we’re not chained to our beds. Anyway, I believed the nightmare was over, and felt fairly confident I had it under control and returned to some of my former lifestyle habits.
I was sampling a pot roast I slow cooked for supper one beautiful, September afternoon. I removed the lid, broke apart a tender chunk of delicious roast with carrots, and accidentally opened my mouth too wide. That’s all it took. I felt the masseter muscle strain and just like that, I was back in the devil’s grip. Only this time, I narrowly escaped to tell you this story. Little did I know, I would be in the worst hell I had ever experienced.
Tegretol is highly effective! Don’t count on your facial pain doctor to prescribe it!
Deep into my recent TN ordeal, I discovered the aforementioned facial pain specialist could have prescribed me Tegretol, and anti-convulsant medication which blocks the pain signals from the trigeminal nerve. This medication is an old school, commonly used treatment for this life altering, acute, intolerable nerve pain which causes many people to contemplate suicide. https://thepaincorner.com/2020/05/09/the-suicide-disease
On a positive note, I discovered there were many qualified and compassionate doctors available 24/7 in minor emergency clinics. Thankfully, my husband drove me to a minor emergency clinic where the attending physician was extremely well versed on trigeminal neuralgia and promptly treated the severe pain. 
 National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 988 Please reach out to someone if you’re experiencing thoughts of ending your life or dial 911 for immediate medical intervention. You deserve the very best care during this difficult time. 

Keeping a symptoms journal can provide you with valuable insight when a persistent condition flares up.

If you're thinking of applying for social security disibility, you'll need to keep excellent records of your illness, doctor visits and medications, if any. Daily records are vital to your case.
During the acute phase of TN, I was only able to eat soft foods that required little chewing and were easily swallowed. I baked russet and sweet potatoes regularly, warmed creamy soups, and in the beginning, heated refried beans in a skillet. These are items I keep on hand. Keeping your cupboard stocked can determine a favorable outcome when you're in the throes of an illness.
Before receiving any medical intervention, I was certain I was on the road to healing. I found my old journals from that time period and followed the steps I took to promote healing, which included a diet consisting of soft foods, proper posture, orthopedic shoes (my Croc sandals offered the best overall support), essential oils, red light therapy and proper sleep position.
After a month, I began to recover. Feeling like I was on the mend, I noticed some minor tooth sensitivity, attributing it to not being able to administer proper oral care during the acute pain stage.

 

Upon further inspection, I discovered my gums had dramatically receded in one area. This prompted me to panic visit the dentist. Use extreme caution when it comes to letting anyone touch your mouth or jaw area when you’re in the devil’s grip! Only YOU know the pain you can tolerate.
I feared I might need a skin graft. Held captive in the chair, I questioned my decision to go to the dentist in the first place while my facial nerve was still hot. I could not have imagined she was coming from behind me with an x-ray tube. I regrettably opened wide, feeling a terrible snap where she inserted the tube. I had never seen such a device. Tugging on dastardly thing, she was having trouble. It was stuck. The damage was done. The next four months would be hell.
                “TAKING A CONSERVATIVE APPROACH”

 

The dentist came in and advised me to go back to the facial pain doctor regarding the gum recession. He mentioned to start brushing my teeth with Sensodyne and advised me to discontinue acidic foods and beverages and limit sugar intake. On his way out he announced, “In cases like this, we like to take a conservative approach.” There was that term again.
Living with Lyme, I was already well informed about living an anti-inflammatory lifestyle. I had years without sugar, acidic foods, beverages and alcohol under my belt.
Two hundred dollars later, my face stung with tears of mental anguish. How could all roads lead back to taking a conservative approach? I felt trapped in a maze. I never mentioned anything to them about what happened. It was poor judgment on my part.

Facial Pain Knockout Arsenal

1. Bravado Topical Anesthetic Cream with Fast Acting 5% Lidocaine https://amzn.to/417Tiuy
Designed for tattoos and cosmetic procedures, this topical cream is considered the strongest over the counter numbing product, utilizing coconut oil as a carrier to deliver deep, penetrating pain relief to calm muscle and nerve pain. I like that it’s enriched with moisturizing vitamin E while aiding in the reduction of inflammation.
It has since replaced my former TMJ pain relief gel. 
2. Anbesol Maximum Strength Gel applied to the inside if the cheek temporarily numbed the angry facial nerve, allowing me time to eat, drink liquids and wash my face until the pain was properly treated by a medical professional. This product is a must have in your facial pain, TMJ/TMD/TN arsenal to calm the excruciating pain while you seek adequate help.

In the Devil's Grip
Part 3

The next day, I awoke to a new nightmare. I couldn’t eat, drink, walk or talk without excruciating shooting facial pain. Unable to turn my head in any direction, I started to experience deep masseter muscle spasming. One side of my face went into spasm so severely I was convulsed. Going in and out of consciousness, I was completely debilitated. I was certain God had forsaken me.

 

The gabapentin wasn’t touching the pain. Deep spasms contorted my face like a Night Gallery painting. My eyes swollen; I was rapidly declining. Unable to eat regularly, I was weak and exhausted. Fighting back hot tears, I fought to hang on.

 

Worried sick, my husband rushed me to minor emergency where I received temporary respite. The physician adequately treated the unimaginable pain with IV meds and prescribed pain medication. Finally, the spasming stopped.
Feeling once again on the mend, it returned with a vengeance the following day. My husband contacted my former facial pain doctor who agreed to see me, praying for a miracle.
Having demanding issues like this feels dystopic. Giving the specialist one more chance, he demanded to know what I had done to cause the pain, insistent on fitting me with another orthotic. My refusal came with a sense of power. I needed immediate relief. Intolerable facial pain comes with urgency.
He said there was nothing more he could do but refer me to a pain management specialist which would more than likely take weeks to get in. When you’re in this kind of condition, you don’t have that kind of time.

 

BENEFITS OF TEGRETOL/ADEQUATE PAIN MANAGEMENT
My husband drove me to another minor ER where I was FINALLY given a prescription for carbamazepine. I call it a miracle drug. While it doesn’t cure trigeminal neuralgia or facial pain, for me, it stopped the pain long enough to allow for long periods of restorative sleep, maintenance of proper oral hygiene and ability to eat a more substantial, well-balanced diet.

Amplify Central Nervous System Healing with Holson's Red Light Therapy from the Comfort of Home

Red light therapy at 650nm X3 penetrates the skin to promote blood circulation while and 805nm X3 penetrates the deepest to relieve inflammation, muscle and nerve pain. Every night, I massage the affected areas of my face with several drops of essential oil followed by a ten-to-fifteen-minute red light laser therapy session. https://www.webmd.com/skin-problems-and-treatments/red-light-therapy
Siberian fir by Doterra is the most effective and potent nerve and muscle pain essential oil in my experience. During my last acute TN flare-up due to a pinched maxillary nerve, I dotted the surrounding area at first with several drops of oil to my spasming masseter muscle. It immediately soothed the non-stop acute nerve pain that when left untreated, felt like end of the world pain.
I cannot emphasize enough the healing power of red-light therapy in combination with Siberian fir oil. Do not give up on yourself during this critical time! Demand proper pain management. This condition is considered the worst pain known to man. 
Ultimately, upper cervical neck adjustments finally released the pinched maxillary nerve. After a series neck, shoulder and mid back adjustments, I was finally on the road to recovery for the long run. https://www.rdhmag.com/

Combining red light therapy with Siberian Fir essential oil by Doterra calmed my acute facial pain within hours.

I strongly encourage anyone struggling with trigeminal neuralgia nerve facial pain, pinched maxillary nerve, or painful mandibular or ophthalmic neuralgias to use red-light near infrared light therapy combined with Siberian fir essential oil. https://amzn.to/3NHLLj2
Red light laser therapy is being used as a non- pharmacologic treatment for people suffering with acute facial pain. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/25024832
For a complete list of essential oils used to treat pain, please visit https://www.yourhealthremedy.com/health-tips/…

Proper Sleep Posture Matters when Recovering from Trigeminal Neuralgia

Acute Stage

Posture and Firm Surfaces are Everything!

Sleep sitting back against pliable pillows (my Euro sham pillows were a lifesaver) on top of a firm mattress or makeshift pallet on the floor. I ended up using mattress grade foam from a local upholstery shop.
Sit and sleep on a FIRM surface, I ended up on a hard futon mattress layered with quilts on our hardwood floor. The maxillofacial area of the face, including jaw, mandible, masseter muscle, trigeminal nerve and cervical neck and shoulder anatomy are extremely posture sensitive and must be taken into consideration. 

 

Note: The featured sleeping positions are ways I managed to get through the difficult, varying stages of the uniquely complex and hellish pain of TN. (including TMJ and TMD) I discovered I was unable to put any pressure on my head or scalp during the acute stage or sit on any surface that wasn’t extremely firm. 

You may find it impossible to sit or sleep on your current mattress or on squishy sofa cushions like you could the day before. I was rudely awakened by the unavoidable reality of maintaining proper sitting, standing and most importantly, sleeping posture in order to expedite healing.
 

 

These Euro sham pillows by Utopia Bedding provided tremendous sleep support during one of the most critical times of my life. I still sleep on them as I continue to recover.

This lightweight Euro sham kept me cool and comfortable during the most painful time of my life.

ABOUT US

My Rustic Healing Journey

Watering my crepe myrtle tree one hot, August evening on the side of our 1950’s era home, I felt something bite the back of my left calf. I turned around only to notice a bright red circular mark which later turned into a well-defined bullseye. Within a week I was catastrophically ill and bedridden with fully disseminated Lyme disease. 

 

By the time I was diagnosed, it was considered too late to adequately kill the infection, but I decided to give the prevailing, late-stage Lyme protocol a shot. After three months of bug killing, I was physically unable to consume any more medication as my stomach began rejecting food. I unknowingly disrupted the good gut bacteria.
 
Little did I know, it would take nearly thirteen years to get my life back on track. In that time, I turned healing from home into an art form. During extended periods of convalescence, I spent most of my time bedridden in what felt like an asteroid belt of virulent symptoms. Researching and studying everything I could about healing from chronic illness, my life was reduced to contending with multiple, concurring health issues marked by short lived stretches of normalcy. I’m still on my bed the majority of the time.
My breakthrough came one morning when I looked in the mirror through a pair of magnifying glasses to examine my teeth. Stunned by the onset of gum recession and gingivitis, the lack of proper oral hygiene during the last facial pain episode visibly took a toll.
 
Overwhelmed with medication side effects, chronic fatigue, strange cardiac phenomena, TMJ, and many other complications, I desperately needed a new approach. I had to address my entire being on a physical, mental and spiritual level. In other words, when it came to my health, I would have to take my power back. My survival depended on it. I by no means have everything figured out. Healing is a lifelong process abound with setbacks. 
If you feel led to support my work, I have a PayPal account. You are under no obligation to do so. https://paypal.me/rustichealing?country.x=US&locale.x=en_US
 
 

 

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